Knowledge

This section contains recommendations of books for LGBTIQ and gender and sexual diversity therapists and clients, and provides links to other suitable organisations.

If you are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, intersex or any other gender or sexual preference and are seeking literature about the societal and personal issues surrounding sexuality and gender, or if you are a therapist who is working with clients such as this and looking for texts to gain a greater understanding, then start your search here.

Once you have found what you are looking for, we highly recommend that you check out Gay’s The Word, a friendly and well stocked bookshop in central London that should meet your requirements. If you do not live in London, consider supporting us by visiting our Amazon shop and purchasing books from there.

We are currently in the process of transferring all of our resources from our old site into these pages, and will continue to add books and material regularly, so this section will continue to grow and expand. Please do visit again if you cannot find what you are looking for just yet. We are also open to suggestions, so if you would like to recommend an appropriate book or link, feel free to contact us.

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Categories:

Advice/Guidance/Support
Partners of Trans
Reading Textbooks for Therapists
Trans
Advice/Guidance/Support
Advice Guidance and Support
Advice Guidance and Support Image

PACE is London’s leading charity promoting the mental health and emotional well-being of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community.

http://www.pacehealth.org.uk/

QwesT FTM UK is a new charity that amalgamates both the FTM Network and Western Boys into one organisation:

http://qwestftmuk.org/

The Metro Centre aims to promote health and well-being through a variety of services.

http://www.metrocentreonline.org/

London Friend is a charity that promotes the social, emotional, physical and sexual health and well-being of lesbian, gay and bisexual people, including transgender people who identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual and all those unsure of their sexuality.

http://www.londonfriend.org.uk/

East London Out Project (ELOP)  is a holistic lesbian and gay centre that offers a range of social, emotional and support services to LGBT communities, and our core services include counselling and young people’s services.http://www.elop.org/

Lesbian and Gay Foundation a large Manchester based organisation offering a wide variety of mental health support and campaigning for LGBT people in Manchester http://www.lgf.org.uk/

Northern Ireland – The Rainbow Project is N.Ireland’s leading LGBT organisation offering support through provision of mental, emotional and physical health support services and influencing policy making.

http://www.rainbow-project.org

Coventry and Warwickshire Friend is a charity that provides help and support to people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or trans (or people looking for more information about those topics)  http://cwfriend.co.uk

Leicester LGBT Centre offers counselling and other forms of support  http://www.leicesterlgbtcentre.org

BOARDING RECOVERY is a group of accredited psychotherapists and trained counsellors who specialize in working with ‘boarding school survivors’

http://www.boardingrecovery.com/

Counselling Directory a national directory and information portal listing qualified therapists
http://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/

Find Counselling Services a UK wide database of counsellors and counselling services

http://www.findcounsellingservices.co.uk/

Alcohol & Drugs
Gay Men and Substance Abuse: A Basic Guide for Addicts and Those Who Care for Them
Gay Men and Substance Abuse: A Basic Guide for Addicts and Those Who Care for Them Image

Written by Michael Shelton. Hazelden. 2011.

Gay Men and Substance Abuse fills a tremendous void, serving as a valuable resource for gay men, professionals, concerned partners, friends, and family members in need of solid information and guidance. Whether faced with a traumatic coming out process, caught up in personal struggles with body image, engulfed in the club culture, or navigating a family system that does not accept his sexuality, a gay man struggling with substance abuse or addiction often faces cultural and personal challenges unique to his life experiences. Yet many men and their loved ones in search of help are forced to adjust to a traditional treatment system, or self-help groups that center on heterosexual relationships, and family groups that neglect to include partners or address what can be a uniquely challenging family dynamic. By exploring the social and psychological factors that play into homosexual men’s addictions, nationally certified treatment counselor Michael Shelton presents a timely, comprehensive look at best practices in meeting the unique needs of gay men in recovery, offering keen insight on a range of issues, including *such common therapeutic approaches as motivational enhancement therapy and 12 Step strategies *successful relapse prevention protocols *tools for recovery from co-occurring sexual disorders *the importance of a loved one’s role with regard to intervention and support *the complicated relationship between gay male drug use and sexual behavior *how to talk knowledgeably, and with care and sensitivity.

Tweakers: How Crystal Meth is Ravaging Gay America
Tweakers: How Crystal Meth is Ravaging Gay America Image

Written by Frank Sanello. Alyson Publications Inc. 2005.

Frank Sanello uses eight case studies to depict his uncompromising exploration of crystal addiction, and vividly illustrates the inevitable downward spiral associated with the habitual use of methamphetamine. Having previously written Opium Wars, Sanello is well qualified to examine how crystal abuse is reaching epidemic levels among gay men. Tweakers get a quick, cheap high, an exhilarating loss of inhibition and increased stamina at the price of permanent behavioural changes, brain damage and death due to the horrifying side effects brought about by the reagenting ingredients used in the processing of crystal. Sanello’s book draws upon conversations with addicts as well as experts in the gay community and at drug treatment centres. While painting a terrifying portrait of a deadly drug and a population at risk, Sanello also shares invaluable information and resources designed to offer hope and help to those who suffer.

HIV Essentials 2013
HIV Essentials 2013 Image

Written by Paul Sax, Calvin Cohen, & Daniel Kuritzkes. Jones and Bartlett. 2013.

The world’s leading experts provide all the ‘Essentials’ needed to manage patients in the office, on the ward, and in the ICU. Completely revised and updated, HIV Essentials 2013 incorporates the latest clinical guidelines into a step-by-step guide to the diagnosis, evaluation, management, and prevention of HIV infection and its complications. Topics include: opportunistic infections and other HIV complications, treatment of HIV and pregnancy, antiretroviral drug summaries, post-exposure prophylaxis, as well as commercially available dosage forms for all ARVs.

The First Year-HIV: An Essential Guide for the Newly Diagnosed
The First Year-HIV: An Essential Guide for the Newly Diagnosed Image

Written by Brett Grodeck. Marlowe & Co. 2003.

Close to one million people are infected with HIVthe virus that causes AIDS in the US, and though in the last ten years therapies have been developed to successfully fight both the HIV infection and its associated illnesses, the physical and emotional tolls are devastating. In the tradition of the other titles in the First Year series, The First YearHIV uses a unique approachguiding readers through their first seven days following diagnosis, then the next three weeks of their first month, and finally the next eleven months of their first yearto provide answers and advice that will help everyone newly diagnosed with HIV come to terms with their condition and the lifestyle changes that accompany it. Starting with the day of diagnosis, author Brett Grodeck provides vital information about the nature of HIV, choosing the right doctors, treatment options, coping mechanisms, holistic alternatives, and much more. The First Year HIV will be a supportive and educational resource for everyone who wants to take an active role in the management of their condition.

Living Confidently with HIV - A Self-Help Book for People living with HIV
Living Confidently with HIV - A Self-Help Book for People living with HIV Image

By Liz Shaw, Erasmo Tacconelli, Robert Watson, Dr Claudia Herbert Editor: Dr Claudia Herbert Blue Stallion Publications 2009

This book is an invaluable manual for those who have HIV or are close to someone who does. It explains with real clarity what the disease is and what it means for someone caught up by it. It sets out the medical responses, the relationships with doctors and the health care system, the ways in which you can be determined to live well, and perhaps above all the emotional strength that can come if you seek it. It’s a book of self-help and self-understanding. It will provide comfort, guidance, courage, and confidence where they are very much needed. It is in a very real sense life-affirming.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook Image

Written by John Dececco, PhD. and Christopher J. Alexander, PhD. Harrington Park Press. 1997.

 

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook is an educational workbook for gay men that covers a variety of topics, including family of origin, addiction, self-image, dating and relationships, AIDS and multiple loss, and spirituality. Each chapter provides an overview of the mental health concerns of gay men, as well as exercises the reader can do to facilitate his personal understanding of the issues covered. While the book is written in nontechnical language, making it useful to the general public, its wide selection of workbook exercises makes it useful for psychotherapists and counselors working with gay men.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men is written to the reader–with brief examples from the author’s work as a clinical psychologist helping gay men. A central goal of the book is to normalize the feelings and experiences the reader has, as many gay men feel like they’re the only ones with their feelings or experiences. The book’s problem-solving approach addresses:

  • family of origin–provides exercises to identify and examine gay men’s role in the family, examine their childhood perceptions of being different, and help them map out family patterns and dynamics
  • self-image–includes self-image assessment questionnaires and written exercises that challenge the reader to look at how they’re affected by societal perceptions
  • addiction–explores why gay men are vulnerable to addictive behavior and offers strategies for change and self-assessment exercises
  • dating and relationships–covers the unique challenges faced by gay men, with exercises for single as well as coupled men
  • AIDS and mental health–provides exercises to help the reader examine the impact of AIDS on his own life and to assess the impact of multiple loss and prolonged grief

    Readers can do the workbook exercises on their own, or therapists can assign chapters and exercises as homework, with clients bringing the completed assignment to therapy for more in-depth exploration and discussion. By providing informative chapters and useful exercises, Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men becomes an avenue through which gay men can understand their identity, experiences, and goals.

Anger Management
Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men. How to Free Yourself from the Grip of Anger and Get More Out of Life
Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men.  How to Free Yourself from the Grip of Anger and Get More Out of Life Image

Thomas J Harbin

Some of the examples are a bit extreme as the author has worked in prisons etc. However, this is a well organised and useful book for men wanting to work on and understand more about their anger.

It's Not Personal!: A Guide to Anger Management
It

Alice J Katz

With useful examples and exercises. Written in an accessible style.

Asexual
Coming to an Asexual Identity: Negotiating Identity, Negotiating Desire
Coming to an Asexual Identity: Negotiating Identity, Negotiating Desire Image

Kristin S. Scherrer

Sexualities 2008
(free booklet to download)

Glad to be asexual
Glad to be asexual Image

Sylvia Pagan Westphal

New Scientist Print Edition
(free booklet to download)

Asexuality: Classification and Characterization
Asexuality: Classification and Characterization Image

Nicole Prause · Cynthia A. Graham
(free booklet to download)

Asylum Seekers
Asylum and Humanitarian Protection for Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual (LGB) People
Asylum and Humanitarian Protection for Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual (LGB) People Image

A guide designed to provide an overview of asylum law and humanitarian protection for lesbian, gay and bisexual people

(Download PDF)

No Going Back. Lesbian and Gay People and the Asylum System
No Going Back. Lesbian and Gay People and the Asylum System Image

Stonewall has published the report No going back: Lesbian and gay people and the asylum system (2010), which is based on interviews with asylum-seekers and UK Border Agency decision-makers. It found almost systemic homophobia in our asylum system resulting in legitimate lesbian, gay and bisexual asylum seekers regularly being refused sanctuary.

(Download PDF)

Bisexual
Bisexuality and Transgerism (Intersexions of the Others)
Bisexuality and Transgerism (Intersexions of the Others) Image

By Jonathon Alexander PhD and Karen Yescavage. Harrington Press 2003

Key Elements: Covers bisexuality and transgender issues extensively, also looks at mental health issues in the bisexual and transger communities, and contains information on bisexuality and transgernderism in non-Western cultures. It provides the keywords essential to that particular chapter. There are over fifteen contributing authors to the book, with a introduction that explain the relationship between the bisexual, transsexual, gay and lesbian communities, and particularly the common ground between the bisexual and transgender communities

The topics by the different authors are as follows:

Introductions

Bisexuality and Transgenderism: Intersexions of the Others
GL vs. BT: The Archaeology of Biphobia and Transphobia
“Tiersius”

Intersecting Communities: B/T Concerns In Common

Just Dropped In To See What Condition My Condition Was In
Pomosexual Play: Going Beyond the Binaristic Limits of Gender?
Swing It Baby!
Bisexual and Transgender Identities in a Nonclinical Sample of North Americans: Suicidal Intent, Behavioural Difficulties, and Mental Health Treatment

Real (izing) Lives: Personal and Theoretical B/T Identity Formations

The Story So Fat
Social Bodies, Pagan Hearts
“There Are Different Points in Your Life Where You Can Go Either Way”
Looking Towards the Intersexions

Reel Live: B/T Pop Cultural Icons

Trans/positioning the (Drag?) King of Comedy: Sandra Bernhard

Butch-Femme Interrupted: Angelina Jolie,-Bisexuality-New Butch Femme

Western Intersections Eastern Approximations

Living More “Like Oneself”; Transgender Identities-Sexualities in Japan
While Diving Drink Water: Bisexual and Transgender Intersections in South Sulawesi, Indonesia
“Outing” and “Duplicity”

Steering Queer of LGBTI Identity Politics

Walking Through Walls-An Immodest Proposal for Trans-cending Sexual Orientation
We Are All Others: An Argument for Queer
Centering. An Alternate Perspective

Bi Any Other Name - Bisexual People Speak Out
Bi Any Other Name - Bisexual People Speak Out Image

Edited by Loraine Hutchins and Lani Kaahumanu. Alyson Books 1991

Key Elements: The four parts (psychology, spirituality, the bisexual community, and politics) contain essays by different authors provide a very wide perspective on virtually every aspect of the bisexual identity.

The book contains contribution from over 75 different writers who supply poems, essays and create writings that detail specifics of the four categories that the book is broken down into to help break the stereotypes and shed light on the experience of bisexual individuals. The book addresses head on the myths and truth surrounding bisexuality.

There is also a glossary of terms related to bisexuality and terms that are required to understand and critiquing the topic. The contributors section gives a summary of all those who have works included in the book.

BiUK, the UK national organisation for bisexual research and activism
BiUK, the UK national organisation for bisexual research and activism Image

have updated the reference lists over on BiUK with the last 5 years worth of JoB articles, plus most of the books, chapters and papers on bisexuality that they use regularly.

There’s now references lists for the following topics:

Biphobia and bi invisibility

Bisexual community/activism

Bisexual experience

Bisexual history

Bisexual relationships

Bisexual theory

Bisexuality in context (education and workplace so far)

Bisexuality in the media and fiction

Health (focus on mental and sexual health)

Intersections with bisexuality (race/culture, trans, gender, age, (dis)ability, religion, class, geography)

Research methods

The Bisexuality Report
The Bisexuality Report Image

Bisexual inclusion in LGBT equality and diversity
Meg Barker, Christina Richards, Rebecca Jones, Helen Bowes-Catton & Tracey Plowman (of BiUK) with Jen Yockney (of Bi Community News) and Marcus Morgan (of The Bisexual Index)

(free booklet to download)

 

BISEXUAL PEOPLE IN THE WORKPLACE
BISEXUAL PEOPLE IN THE WORKPLACE Image

Practical advice for employers

(free booklet to download)

BME
Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men
Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men Image

Beverly Greene
Sage Publications. 1997.

A broad range of culture-related topics specific to the lesbian and gay community are explored in this volume. Along with empirical, clinical and theoretical discussions, personal narrative offers poignant insight into additional complexities, pressures and losses that lesbians and gay men must cope with in a world that often handles diversity with bigotry.

 

Lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) people from Black and minority ethnic communities
ISSUES IN THERAPY WITH LESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL AND TRANSGENDER CLIENTS
Cancer
Lesbians and Cancer.
Smear test for Lesbians.
Coming Out
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture Image

Jack Drescher, MD and Kenneth Zucker, PhD
Routledge. 2006.

Defenders and critics of the controversial Spitzer study analyze its methodologies and findings

In 2001, Robert L. Spitzer, MD, presented his study on sexual conversion therapy with its controversial findings that some homosexuals can change their sexual orientation. The resulting media sensation and political firestorm enraged the study’s critics and emboldened its supporters. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture presents leading experts examining Spitzer’s research methodology and findings to discern whether the study itself deserves deeper consideration or outright dismissal. Every facet of the study is reviewed to discuss the positive or negative aspects of the results, its significance in political and social terms, and the implications for the future.

Dr. Spitzer himself was an instrumental figure in the American Psychiatric Association’s decision in 1973 to remove homosexuality as a mental illness listing from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual-III. His later study that states that in some individuals, homosexuality may be more fluid than previously thought stirred controversy in the psychiatric community and society at large. His study is presented here to allow the reader to evaluate and consider it for themselves. Leading experts then voice their own pro or con views on the methodology and findings. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture fearlessly illustrates the sometimes fuzzy boundary between science and politics, courageously spotlighting the culture wars now dividing our society.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture discusses:

  • the ex-gay movement
  • the nature of scientific inquiry
  • the relationship between science and politics
  • the results of sexual conversion therapies
  • gay and lesbian rights

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture is essential reading for sex researchers, mental health professionals, pastoral counselors, political activists, and any person asking if one can truly “change” his or her homosexuality.

How to cope with doubts about your sexual identity
How to cope with doubts about your sexual identity Image

MIND (National Association for Mental Health) Leaflet.

(Download as PDF)

Coming Out Every Day: A Gay, Bisexual or Questioning Man's Guide
Coming Out Every Day: A Gay, Bisexual or Questioning Man

Brett K. Johnson (1997) Oakland, Ca: New Harbinger Pubs

Chapter 1 Taking Your Personal Inventory;

Chapter 2 Who Am I?

Chapter 3 Getting Out of Your Own Way;

Chapter 4 Healing a Lifetime of Shame and Guilt;

Chapter 5 Searching for Safety and Support;

Chapter 6 Take Care of Yourself: Spiritual and Emotional  Health;

Chapter 7 Questioning Questions and Finding Answers;

Chapter 8 To Come Out or Not to Come Out;

Chapter 9 Out in Your Own Right;

Chapter 10 Family Ties;

Chapter 11 Finding Friends and Lovers;

Chapter 12 Here’s to Your Sexual Health;

Chapter 13 Beyond Discrimination;

Chapter 14 From Here on Out

Together: A Guide to Love, Life and Lube
Together: A Guide to Love, Life and Lube Image

Patrick Gayle. Gay Times Books, London 2001

Key Elements: Easy language and an easy read complete with the very good draws that appear throughout the text. It covers just about everything related to the gay lifestyle. With the exception of the HIV medication (which has thankfully progressed since the publication of this book in 2001) information it is timeless all you need to know about being gay and gay relationships.

The chapters are:

1. Coming Out (the process)

2. Mates (how to make and keep friends, relationships)

3. Getting Older (aging as a gay man) Finding A Place to live (renting, homelessness, everything related to

4. Employment (everything from starting work to discrimination to trade union

5. Debt and Credit Problems (sorting out debts)

6. Body Stuff (hair, hearing, eyes

7. Doing It (fetishes, erogenous zones, pheromones)

8. Diet and Nutrition (what the body needs)

9. Exercise (the heart, blood pressure, injuries)

10. Sleep (Information about sleep)

11. Smoking (damage to health and quitting)

12. Alcohol (the liver, units, limits, and hangovers)

13. Recreational Drugs (safer use, types of drugs)

14. DIY Check-Up and personal hygiene (skin, tattoos, piercing, teeth, nails)

15. Sexually Transmitted Infection (STIs)

16. Sexual Health Clinics and check-ups (what to expect)

17. Stress, Anxiety, Depression (Managing with them)

18. Alternative and Complementary Therapies (aroma-therapy and other forms of alternative medicine)

The Adonis Complex: How to Identify, Treat, and Prevent Body Obsession in Men and Boys
The Adonis Complex: How to Identify, Treat, and Prevent Body Obsession in Men and Boys Image

By Harrison G. Pope, Jr. M.D., Katherine A. Phillips, M.D., and Roberto Olivardia, Ph.D. Touchstone Publications, New York, New York, 2000

Key Elements: A scientific and social exploration of the body dismorphia, and the condition of muscle dysmorphia that was first named and identified by the authors of the book.

Includes valuable information about the increase of steroid use, attitudes that men, young and old have about their bodies, and how the male relationship with body image has changed throughout the recent decades and has information about gay men and some reference to gender. The book also contains three good appendixes, one that covers the fat – free mass index, the second diagnostic criteria for body image disorders, and the third where to get support for body image disorders.

There are eleven chapters which explore the topic from the beginning with cultural and historical references to how the disorder began to develop in Western culture and the possible treatment options that are available today.

There is information for parents and for others to help identify the complex in the men and boys who may be part of their lives.

Positively Gay: New Approaches in Gay and Lesbian Life
Positively Gay: New Approaches in Gay and Lesbian Life Image

Foreword by Evelyn Hooker, PhD. Celestial Arts, 1979

Key Elements: All of the topics are covered thoroughly and extensively, some information that is shared in the book has been surpassed since it was published, some of the essays are also very American in what they share. It is however a very good read. It contains a Positively Gay Discussion Guide for education, training, and personal growth.

The topics covered are: Family Relationships, Mental Health, Religion, Coupling, Aging, Job Security, Financial Planning, Political Organizing, Financial Planning, Gay Voting Power, Gay Art, Judaism and the Gay Community, and Being a Gay Professional.

Sissyphobia Gay Men and Effeminate Behaviour
Sissyphobia Gay Men and Effeminate Behaviour Image

Tim Bergling, Foreword by Mark Simpson. Southern Tier Edititions, Harrington Park Press, 2001

Key Elements: A friendly guy next door writing style that explores an important topic in gay culture. This very American book is an easy read and very interesting it has good illustrations as well.

Chapter 1: ‘No Femmes Need Apply’, this covers the internal judgement about gay behaviour and being observed in public, it also looks at ‘straight acting’ and its role in the gay community.

Chapter 2: ‘Origin of the ‘Species’, looks at ‘why do effeminate guys act like that?’ theories behind effeminate behaviour, masculine gay behaviour and effeminate gay behaviour

Chapter 3: ‘Growing Pains’, explores the childhood messages that we receive from parents and our environmental surroundings, changes and metamorphosis of adolescents and developing on awareness of being gay

Chapter 4: ‘Fear and Loathing’, tries to address the question of why people have developed a strong dislike of effeminate behaviour ‘what is it about effeminate men that makes them such a target of unbridled contempt’

Chapter 5: ‘The Enemy Within’, carrying the secret of being gay, the internal emotional turbulence and early experiences with effeminate male behaviour and studies that explore the reactions to effeminate male gay behaviour

Chapter 6 : ‘Dude Looks Like A Lady’, the rites of passage in gay life, gay men who dress as women, violent femmes, a little history of the gay movement, drag queens, the link effeminate behaviour and flamey camp behaviour

Chapter 7: ‘Be All You Can Be’, Gay Men and the Military

Chapter 8: ‘The Next Generation’, the changing views of gay men about gay effeminate behaviour.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook Image

Written by John Dececco, PhD. and Christopher J. Alexander, PhD. Harrington Park Press. 1997.

 

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook is an educational workbook for gay men that covers a variety of topics, including family of origin, addiction, self-image, dating and relationships, AIDS and multiple loss, and spirituality. Each chapter provides an overview of the mental health concerns of gay men, as well as exercises the reader can do to facilitate his personal understanding of the issues covered. While the book is written in nontechnical language, making it useful to the general public, its wide selection of workbook exercises makes it useful for psychotherapists and counselors working with gay men.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men is written to the reader–with brief examples from the author’s work as a clinical psychologist helping gay men. A central goal of the book is to normalize the feelings and experiences the reader has, as many gay men feel like they’re the only ones with their feelings or experiences. The book’s problem-solving approach addresses:

  • family of origin–provides exercises to identify and examine gay men’s role in the family, examine their childhood perceptions of being different, and help them map out family patterns and dynamics
  • self-image–includes self-image assessment questionnaires and written exercises that challenge the reader to look at how they’re affected by societal perceptions
  • addiction–explores why gay men are vulnerable to addictive behavior and offers strategies for change and self-assessment exercises
  • dating and relationships–covers the unique challenges faced by gay men, with exercises for single as well as coupled men
  • AIDS and mental health–provides exercises to help the reader examine the impact of AIDS on his own life and to assess the impact of multiple loss and prolonged grief

    Readers can do the workbook exercises on their own, or therapists can assign chapters and exercises as homework, with clients bringing the completed assignment to therapy for more in-depth exploration and discussion. By providing informative chapters and useful exercises, Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men becomes an avenue through which gay men can understand their identity, experiences, and goals.

Compulsive & Problematic Sex
Why “Sexual Addiction” Is Not A Useful Diagnosis - And Why It Matters
Why “Sexual Addiction” Is Not A Useful Diagnosis - And Why It Matters Image

By Marty Klein Ph.D

Read article here

Sex Addiction: A Dangerous Clinical Concept
Sex Addiction: A Dangerous Clinical Concept Image

Article on the Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality by Marty Klein Ph.D

Understanding compulsive sexual behavior
Understanding compulsive sexual behavior Image

Online information from American Psychological Association

Read article here

Covert Sexual Abuse of the Gay Male Culture, Leading to Sexual Addiction
Covert Sexual Abuse of the Gay Male Culture, Leading to Sexual Addiction Image

National Council of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity

Depression
Queer Blues: the lesbian and gay guide to overcoming depression
Queer Blues: the lesbian and gay guide to overcoming depression Image

Kimeran Hardin PhD and Marny Hall PhD, Forward By Betty Berzon PhD. New Harbinger Publications, 2001

Key Elements: A clear and coherent exploration of how and why lesbians and gays experience depression, a well rounded approach to helping gays and lesbians deal with the particulars of depressions from a perspective that supports the diversity the of the gay and lesbian community.

Chapter 1. ‘Shades of Blue: What Depression Is and Isn’t’ there is an overview of depression, the symptoms of major depression, varieties of depression, an summary of the causes of depression, the role of the biological, psychological and environmental causes.

Chapter 2. ‘Blue Passages: How Society Contributes to Depression for Lesbians and Gays’, looks at the role that culture plays in depression, the passages that we have from one stage of life to another.

Chapter 3. ‘Blue Genes; Internal Contributions to Depression’ provides diagrams that explain the nervous system, the brain, the nerves and neurons, the neurotransmitters, norepinephrine, serotonin, dopamine, the hormone connection , genetics, links between the brain chemistry, hormones, and genetics.

Chapter 4. ‘Blue Portraits: Queer Stories’, there are different types of ‘Blues covered in chapter 4, they are, ‘The Winter Blues’. ‘Survivor Blues’. ‘Bipolar Disorder’, ‘Gender Blues’ and ‘Postpartum Blues’.

Chapter 5. ‘Tips for Main Squeezes: How to Cope With A Depressed Partner’, information about the myths you may have heard (about depression), the informal signs of your partner’s depression, it also provides information on what to do if your partner is suicidal.

Chapter 6 .’Monitoring The Minotaur: Self – Management and Self-Nurturing’, here the relationship between cognition, beliefs and behaviour, it also how to increase your awareness of negative thoughts.

Chapter 7. ‘Queer Psychology Therapy: The Talking Cure-How to Choose a Therapist’ details are given about psychiatrists, psychologists, counsellors and other practical issues related to therapy, along with summaries of different theoretical approaches.

Chapter 8. ‘Medications and Other Biological Treatments: Queer Psychiatrists Speak Out’, sums up the medications for managing depression, Heterocyclic (commonly prescribed antidepressants), Selective Serotonin Reuptake (SSRI), Monoamine Oxidase (MAOIs), other novel and atypical antidepressants, there are also conversations with authorities.

Chapter 9. ‘Befriending The Black Dog: Putting It All Together’, gives views of the holistic views of the blues, the politics of identity, profiles in courage, and ‘leaving the queer blues’.

How to Lift Depression [...fast]
How to Lift Depression [...fast] Image

Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrell (2004)

A practical approach using some of the latest thinking on how to tackle depression. This is a very useful self-help book. Part One is on understanding depression, Part Two, how to lift depression and Part Three is on seeking professional help.

Lift Depression website

DEALING WITH A SUICIDAL PERSON
Disabled
Queer Cripps: disabled gay men and their stories
Queer Cripps: disabled gay men and their stories Image

Eds: Bob Guter and John R Killacky

Get an inside perspective on life as a disabled gay man!

Queer Crips: Disabled Gay Men and Their Stories reverberates with the sound of “cripgay” voices rising to be heard above the din of indifference and bias, oppression and ignorance. This unique collection of compelling first-person narratives is at once assertive, bold, and groundbreaking, filled with characters—and character. Through the intimacy of one-on-one storytelling, gay men with mobility and neuromuscular disorders, spinal cord injury, deafness, blindness, and AIDS, fight isolation from society—and each other—to establish a public identity and a common culture

Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender People with Developmental Disabilties and Mental Retardation: Stories of the rainbow support group
Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender People with Developmental Disabilties and Mental Retardation: Stories of the rainbow support group Image

John D Allen

The Sexual Politics of Disability: untold desires
The Sexual Politics of Disability: untold desires Image

Tom Shakespeare, Kath Gillespie-Sells and Dominic Davies

The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability: For All of Us who Live with Disabilities, Chronic Pain and Illness
The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability: For All of Us who Live with Disabilities, Chronic Pain and Illness Image

Miriam Kaufman, Cory Silverberg, Fran Odette

The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability is the first complete sex guide for people who live with disabilities, pain, illness, or chronic conditions. Useful for absolutely everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation, the book addresses a wide range of disabilities — from chronic fatigue, back pain, and asthma to spinal cord injury, hearing and visual impairment, multiple sclerosis, and more. Expertly written by a medical doctor, a sex educator, and a disability activist, The Ultimate Guide provides readers with encouragement, support, and all the information they need to create a sex life that works for them. The authors cover all aspects of sex and disability, including building a positive sexual self-image; positions to minimize stress and maximize pleasure; dealing with fatigue or pain during sex; finding partners and talking with partners about sex and disability; adapting sex toys; and more.

Disabled lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) people
Employment
HOW TO ENGAGE GAY PEOPLE IN YOUR WORK
HOW TO ENGAGE GAY PEOPLE IN YOUR WORK Image

Stonewall

 

(Download PDF)

STRAIGHT ALLIES How they help create gay-friendly workplaces
Families of Gender & Sexual Minorities
Out of the Ordinary: essays on growing up with gay, lesbian and transgender parents
Out of the Ordinary: essays on growing up with gay, lesbian and transgender parents Image

Eds: Noelle Howey and Ellen Samuels

Out of the Ordinary is a truly unique anthology, a groundbreaking collection of essays by the grown children of lesbian, gay, and transgender parents. Ranging from humorous to poignant, the essays touch on some of the most important and complicated issues facing them: dealing with a parent’s sexuality while developing an identity of one’s own; overcoming homophobia at school and at family or social gatherings; and defining the modern family. In a time when traditional family structure has undergone radical change, Out of the Ordinary is an important look at the meaning of love, family, and relationships, and will speak to anyone who has lived or is interested in non-traditional families

Invisible Families: For Parents Of Lesbian & Gay Childrenm
Invisible Families: For Parents Of Lesbian & Gay Childrenm Image

Written by Terry Stewart. Heartflags. 2008.

Invisible Families is a book for parents of lesbian and gay children. It aims to help conservative families talk openly, heal rifts and achieve a loving understanding. Invisible Families has helped thousands of people since it was first published. It continues to be valued for its’ insights and guidance. Counsellors, teachers, friends and anyone who is part of the family will find Invisible Families to be useful. It also contains an interesting introduction to issues relating to Maori and Polynesian people.

Families like Mine: children of gay parents tell it like it is
Families like Mine: children of gay parents tell it like it is Image

Ed: Abigail Garner

Based on eight years of activism, combined with interviews with more than fifty sons and daughters, Families Like Mine debunks the anti-gay myth that these children grow up damaged and confused. At the same time, Garner’s book refutes the popular pro-gay sentiment that these children turn out “just like everyone else.” In addition to the typical stresses of growing up, the unique pressures these children face are not due to their parents’ sexuality, but rather to homophobia and prejudice. Using a rich blend of journalism and memoir, Garner offers empathetic yet unapologetic opinions about the gifts and challenges of being raised in families that are often labeled “controversial.”

Life Curves: sons talk about their gay fathers
Life Curves: sons talk about their gay fathers Image

Ed: Andrew R Gottlieb

This book looks at how sons react to learning that their fathers are gay, allowing us to see, over time, how this has changed their family relationships and their own lives. Simply and elegantly written, this psychoanalytically oriented qualitative research study is accessible to both the beginner and the more advanced researcher and practitioner. It draws from a wide range of literary, popular, and psychological sources and includes an interview guide, a reference section, and an index. Sons Talk About Their Gay Fathers: Life Curves is a storybook-an extended narrative moved along, but not overshadowed, by psychoanalytic theory. The Introduction briefly reviews more recent writings of the fathering experience as told by gay men themselves, setting the stage for “Father to Child” — a look at the father as seen through the ever-shifting eyes of his son at different phases of the life cycle; “The Quest for the Real Father” — an examination of sons’ responses to their fathers’ homosexuality as captured in film, fiction, nonfiction, television, and the psychological literature; “Methodology” — the story of the research process, including sampling, the search for subjects, trustworthiness, the interview, bias, and data collection; “The Stories” — an anthology of narratives the author constructed from the interview material, painting an intimate portrait of each individual son; “Findings” — a categorical analysis; and “Discussion” — a summary of all the preceding material cast in a developmental framework, highlighting implications for future research and clinical practice

Straight Parents, Gay Children: keeping families together
Straight Parents, Gay Children: keeping families together Image

Robert Bernstein

Straight Parents, Gay Children is Robert Bernstein’s moving account of how he came to terms with his daughter’s homosexuality and how the experience has enriched his life. Bernstein — winner of the 1996 Award for Best Scholarship on the Subject of Intolerance, awarded by the Gustaves Myers Center for the Study of Human Rights in North America — discusses the myths surrounding homosexuality, accepting the news, parents who speak out, public figures who have gay children, and more. Straight Parents, Gay Children is a survival guide for all parents who wish to help their gay children cope with the inevitable cruelty from which they cannot hide. This revised and updated edition includes an introduction by Robert MacNeil of MacNeil/Lehrer Productions and a foreword by Candace Gingrich, author of The Accidental Activist “Bob Bernstein has done a wonderful job. I wish his book could be required reading for the world.”—Betty DeGeneres, spokesperson, Human Rights Campaign, National Coming Out Project “Bernstein’s tone is personal, his advice is sound … a valuable addition to the psychological self-help collections.”—Charles Harmon, Booklist “A succinct, moving book about parents who have defied the social stigma of homosexuality to publicly support their gay children.”—Washington Blade

Gay Life
The Ins and Outs of Gay Sex
The Ins and Outs of Gay Sex Image

Stephen Goldstone

Anal Pleasure and Health - A Guide for Men and Women
Anal Pleasure and Health - A Guide for Men and Women Image

Jack Morin. Yes Press, 1981

Key Elements: This book contains research into the subject of anal sex from a personal user friendly and clinical point of view and can be used by anyone who is interested in the topic for personal knowledge, to have better anal sex or to understand more about the topic to professional reasons. The book also includes research into how personal therapy was used to help individuals to feel more comfortable having anal sex. Contains few facts from an American perspective and the chapters also have a part on how to experience what is covered in each specific chapter.

Chapter One – Anal Pleasure and the Anal Taboo
The history and social background of the anal sex taboo, and the possible functions of the anal sex taboo
Chapter Two – The Anal Taboo and the Helping Professionals
Anal taboo in medicine, and taboo is psychology and counselling and their history in those fields is covered. Sex therapy and anal concerns (what they generally think about the topic and taboos that one may be holding on to), includes reducing anal tension.
Chapter Three – How to Use This Book
The structure of the book, how it’s to be used and the other relevant points to consider when using the text
Chapter Four – Looking and Touching
Self-exploration of the anal area (and ideas of how to develop a better relationship with your anal area)
Chapter Five – Beneath the Skin
The anatomy of the anal area, this chapter includes male and female diagrams of the pelvic muscles
Chapter Six – Mind and Body
The link between emotions and the anal area also includes the anal reactions to stress
Chapter Seven – Inside the Anus
The anatomy and physiology of the anal canal, includes a diagram of the internal and external anal sphincter muscles, has information on anal douching (enemas) and lubrication
Chapter Eight – Anal Eroticism
Sexual responses and the anus includes the four phases of sexual responses with a description of the phases according to Master’s and Johnson and how they relate to anal pleasure, drugs and anal eroticism are also covered
Chapter Nine – Discovering the Rectum
The anatomy and physiology of the rectum, with diagrams of the rectum and the effects that that angles of entry have on rectal penetration, fisting is mentioned, objects used for rectal stimulation are also covered (anal stimulators, candles, soft vibrators, small vibrators) with the details of how to experience the things mentioned in this chapter
Chapter Ten – Attitudes towards Rectal Stimulation
How to deal with the psychological blocks associated with anal sex, includes the psychological blocks to feces, the ideas of homophobia linked to anal sex, and the masculine and feminine identity roles socially related to anal sex
Chapter Eleven – Opening a Dialogue
How to discuss the topic openly and honestly with another
Chapter Twelve – Mutual Exploration
How to choose a partner, and ways of mutual anal discovery
Chapter Thirteen – Anal Intercourse
Includes diagrams of positions for anal intercourse, and details how experience and explore anal sex safely
Chapter Fourteen – Power and Anal Pleasure
The interpersonal dynamics that occur during anal sex, including the issues of power, symbols of power, and the sexual excitement of power, and anal sex and power
Chapter Fifteen – The Context of Anal Pleasure
The private side of anal sex, finding a physician and maintaining a private life
Appendix A: Common Problems of the Anus and Rectum
Appendix B: Research Process and Findings

Resurrecting Sex: solving sexual problems and revolutionizing your relationship
Resurrecting Sex: solving sexual problems and revolutionizing your relationship Image

David Schnarch (2002)

Part 1: A Crash Course in Sex

Part 2:
How Sexual Relationships Work

Part 3:
Medical Options

Part 4: Couples in Search of Solutions

Appendices

Note: Although this book is aimed at straight couples in monogamous relationships, there is much here that will be of immense benefit to sexual minority couples.

The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men
The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men Image

Bill Brent. Cleis Press, 2002

Key Elements: Provides illustrations on the parts of the body and the positions used for anal sex along with tips needed to have good anal sex. The book also has exercises for the reader to learn more anal sex, explore the topic from different points of views and to enjoy anal sex.

Chapter One – Not in My Ass: 12 Myths about Anal Sex for Men
The truth behind the twelve biggest myths about anal sex for men
Chapter Two – How It Works and How to Work It: Anatomy and Exercise
The workings of the anorectal anatomy with diagrams and explanations of the anus, the anal sphincter muscles, the perineal muscles, also has a description and summaries of the functions of the rectum , anal canal, prostate gland, the colon, the large intestines, with techniques and exercises on how to keep them in shape, with information on how to massage the prostate gland. The female G-spot and double penetration
Chapter Three – Self-Exploration and Self Play: Massage, Masturbation, and More
Self-exploration with fingers and tools
Chapter Four – Hygiene and Diet
Basic hygiene and diet, step by step advice and devices used for rinsing
Chapter Five – Communication
How to open verbal communication can increase the likelihood of satisfying anal sex (also includes discussing safer sex and degree of risk issues)
Chapter Six – Latex and Lube
Latex and polyurethane, condoms, and lubricants
Chapter Seven – Tools and Toys
Toys, and what makes a good anal sex toy (includes varieties of butt plugs, dildos, oral beads, and vibrators)
Chapter Eight – Tongue in Cheek: Analingus
The tongue and anal sex plus health risks to consider
Chapter Nine – Penetration
Suggestions for the insertive partner and suggestions for the receptive partner with illustrations on positions for anal sex
Chapter Ten – Fisting
Myths about fisting, information for the insertive partner, and the receptive partner
Chapter Eleven – Extreme Sex: S/M, Gender Play, Festishes, Piss Play, and Scat Play
S/M and anal play – how to negotiate, gender play, electrical play, piss play, and the health risk associated with them
Chapter Twelve – Recreational Drugs and Sex
Recreational drugs – alcohol, cocaine, ecstasy, marijuana, poppers, methamphetamine
Chapter Thirteen – Anal Health
Anal irritations, hemorrhoids, anal fissures, anal fistulas, STD, Chlamydia, epididymitis, prostatitis, gonorrhea, hepatitis, hepatitis A, hepatitis B, hepatitis C, herpes, HIV, venereal warts, anal sex, pregnancy, and your anal health and well being
Chapter Fourteen – Resources
A list of books, magazines,videos, etc.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook Image

Written by John Dececco, PhD. and Christopher J. Alexander, PhD. Harrington Park Press. 1997.

 

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook is an educational workbook for gay men that covers a variety of topics, including family of origin, addiction, self-image, dating and relationships, AIDS and multiple loss, and spirituality. Each chapter provides an overview of the mental health concerns of gay men, as well as exercises the reader can do to facilitate his personal understanding of the issues covered. While the book is written in nontechnical language, making it useful to the general public, its wide selection of workbook exercises makes it useful for psychotherapists and counselors working with gay men.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men is written to the reader–with brief examples from the author’s work as a clinical psychologist helping gay men. A central goal of the book is to normalize the feelings and experiences the reader has, as many gay men feel like they’re the only ones with their feelings or experiences. The book’s problem-solving approach addresses:

  • family of origin–provides exercises to identify and examine gay men’s role in the family, examine their childhood perceptions of being different, and help them map out family patterns and dynamics
  • self-image–includes self-image assessment questionnaires and written exercises that challenge the reader to look at how they’re affected by societal perceptions
  • addiction–explores why gay men are vulnerable to addictive behavior and offers strategies for change and self-assessment exercises
  • dating and relationships–covers the unique challenges faced by gay men, with exercises for single as well as coupled men
  • AIDS and mental health–provides exercises to help the reader examine the impact of AIDS on his own life and to assess the impact of multiple loss and prolonged grief

    Readers can do the workbook exercises on their own, or therapists can assign chapters and exercises as homework, with clients bringing the completed assignment to therapy for more in-depth exploration and discussion. By providing informative chapters and useful exercises, Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men becomes an avenue through which gay men can understand their identity, experiences, and goals.

Couple Therapy with Gay Men
Couple Therapy with Gay Men Image

David E. Greenan and Gil Tunnell
Guilford Press. 2002.

This book illuminates the unique needs of gay male couples in therapy and provides a practical framework for clinical intervention. The authors review the basic principles of structural family therapy and guide therapists in adapting treatment goals and interventions to better serve gay clients. Addressed are the universal issues faced by all couples in therapy, gay and straight, as well as the particular challenges gay men face in building nurturing, intimate relationships in a homophobic society. Extensive case examples and session transcripts are used to illustrate effective strategies for helping clients affirm the strength of their union, even in the absence of familial and social support; learn to resolve differences constructively; and overcome culturally conditioned barriers to connection and trust.

Gay Spirituality
Christianity, Social Tolerance and Homosexuality: Gay People in Westen Europe from the Beginning of the Christian Era to the 14th Century
Christianity, Social Tolerance and Homosexuality: Gay People in Westen Europe from the Beginning of the Christian Era to the 14th Century Image

J. Boswell
University of Chicago Press. 1981.

John Boswell’s National Book Award-winning study of the history of attitudes toward homosexuality in the early Christian West was a groundbreaking work that challenged preconceptions about the Church’s past relationship to its gay members – among them priests, bishops, and even saints – when it was first published twenty-five years ago. The historical breadth of Boswell’s research (from the Greeks to Aquinas) and the variety of sources consulted make this one of the most extensive treatments of any single aspect of Western social history. “Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality”, still fiercely relevant today, helped form the disciplines of gay and gender studies, and it continues to illuminate the origins and operations of intolerance as a social force.

 

Gay Spirit Warrior: an empowerment workbook for men who love men
Gay Spirit Warrior: an empowerment workbook for men who love men Image

J. R. Stowe (1999)

Part One: Foundation

Chapter 1 Introductions;

Chapter 2 Beginnings;

Chapter 3 Early Beliefs;

Chapter 4 The Body Connection;

Chapter 5 Initiation.

Part Two: Archetypes and Gay Men

Chapter 6 The Journey Within;

Chapter 7 The Magic Boy;

Chapter 8 The Sacred Androgyne;

Chapter 9 The Lover;

Chapter 10 The Elder;

Chapter 11 The Shaman/Healer;

Chapter 12 The Warrior;

Chapter 13 The Explorer.

Part Three: Take Your Place

Chapter 14 Sustain Yourself in the World;

Chapter 15 Live in the World;

Chapter 16 The Journey Continues.

Gay Soul: Finding the Heart of Gay Spirit and Nature with Sixteen Writers, Healers Teachers and Visionaries
Gay Soul: Finding the Heart of Gay Spirit and Nature with Sixteen Writers, Healers Teachers and Visionaries Image

M. Thomson (ed.) (1995)

James Broughton: Gaiety of Soul;

Paul Monette: On Becoming;

Richard Isay: Rising to Love;

Andrew Harvey: Rebirth Through the Wound;

Andrew Ramer: Tribal Wisdom;

Harry Hay: Reinventing Ourselves;

Will Roscoe: The Geography of Gender;

Clyde Hall: Great Spirit;

James Saslow: Crossing the Categories;

Ram Dass: A Life Beyond Labels;

Joseph Kramer: Body and Soul;

Guy Baldwin: Reclaiming the Exiled Self;

Ed Steinbrecher: Sex with God;

Robert Hopcke: The Union of Sames;

Malcolm Boyd: Survival with Grace;

Mitch Walker: Coming Out Inside.

Gay Body: A Journey Through Shadow to Self
Gay Body: A Journey Through Shadow to Self Image

M. Thomson, (ed.) (1997)

Chapter 1 Strange Kind of Paradise;

Chapter 2 We, Two Brothers Clinging;

Chapter 3 Wounded Healer;

Chapter 4 Tricksters in a Mirror;

Chapter 5 Burning Times;

Chapter 6 Shadow Play;

Chapter 7 Departures, Sacred and Profane;

Epilogue: How We Die.

Quran FAQ from Imman
Queer Spirituality
Gender Variant
Transsexual and Other Disorders of Gender Identity: A Practical Guide to Management
Transsexual and Other Disorders of Gender Identity: A Practical Guide to Management Image

Edited by James Barrett. Radcliffe Publishing. 2007.

People with gender identity problems are increasingly often encountered by health professionals. The problems are often imagined to consist only of transsexuality, but actually comprise of both this and many other diagnoses. Properly establishing a diagnosis and excluding alternatives including psychosis, partial androgen insensitivity syndromes and personality disorder is complex. The subsequent management of these disorders and their differential diagnoses is even more so. “Transsexual and other Disorders of Gender Identity” provides a comprehensive and extremely practical account of the management of disorders of gender identity and their differential diagnoses. Particular consideration is given to, among others, coincidental mental illness, disability, family and relationship issues, forensic and military settings. Psychological and endocrine aspects are covered in depth, surgical aspects to a level adequate for all but a specialist surgeon, and legal aspects to the level generally needed by health professionals. This book provides vital detail for general practitioners, surgeons, endocrinologists, speech therapists, social workers and, especially, psychiatrists.

“I conceived and edited this book because when asked for recommended reading on the practicalities of treatment for disorders of gender identity I had nothing to suggest to others. I was always able to provide lists of books which dealt with the classification of gender identity disorders, and texts rich with competing aetiological theories. There were also fascinating sociopolitical (including post-modern) expositions. The problem always came with recommending practical texts for everyday clinical use.” – James Barrett, in the Preface.

My Gender Workbook
My Gender Workbook Image

Kate Bornstein. Routledge, 1998

Key Elements:
This twelve chapter book contains questionnaires and quizzes to encourage the reader to question their own ideas and the personal perspective on gender. The particulars of the book are very original; among the original ideas is the ‘gender- identity- power pyramid ‘to help place gender in the context of other elements in our society like class, race, and economic status along with the role that these things play in shaping our identity. There is the ‘perfectly gendered questionnaire’ which encourages a 360 degree evaluation of gender. The book also covers related topic like spirituality, and expands on the importance of other related topics.

Chapter One: Welcome To Your Gender Workbook – a reflection on your gender ideas
Chapter Two: Solving The Gender Puzzle- the basics of sex and gender
Chapter Three: Who’s On Top? – a test that reflects how perfectly gendered you may or may not be
Chapter Four: Be All That You Can Be! – living outside the laws of gender
Chapter Five: Fuck Your Gender- love, sex, desire, and gender
Chapter Six: Just Say No-looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Seven: Just Say Yes- looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Eight: Zen and the Art of Gender Maintenance-focuses on all of the identities that you are
Chapter Nine: The Playground-going back to childhood fun
Chapter Ten: Cautionary Interlude-reconnecting with the planet and looking at all of the self, both good and bad
Chapter Eleven: The Quiet Revolution- how to deal with the in revolution
that we are all a part of
Chapter Twelve: Okay, Now What- looking at what’s next on the road to gender discovery

Transgender Warriors (Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman)
Transgender Warriors (Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman) Image

Leslie Fienberg. Beacon Press, 1996

Key Elements: This body of work takes a historical, multicultural, and personal, approach to the issues of gender and those that have fought to change society’s perception of gender. The book also includes an International Gender Bill of Rights, a list of transgender organisations and publications. There are pictures throughout the book that document the transgender journey historically and culturally.

Part One: The author’s personal history and other early transgender histories

Chapter One – The Journey Begins
Chapter Two – My Path to Consciousness
Chapter Three – The Give Away
Chapter Four – They Called Her ‘Hommasse’

Part Two: Transgendered multicultural identities around the world

Chapter Five – Our Second Past
Chapter Six –  Bigotry Began
Chapter Seven –  They Had Slaves!
Chapter Eight – Natural Becomes ‘Unnatural’

Part Three: Transgender warriors throughout history and transgender pioneers

Chapter Nine – ‘Holy War’ against Trans People
Chapter Ten – Leading the Change
Chapter Eleven- Not Just Passing

Part Four: The spiritual elements of the intersexed identity

Chapter Twelve – From Germany to Stonewall
Chapter Thirteen – To Be or Not to Be
Chapter Fourteen – Sisterhood: Make It Real!
Chapter Fifteen – Making History

Part Five: The Portrait Gallery

GSD & Education
We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents
We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents Image

Turan Ali. Continuum International Publishing Group Ltd. 1996.

An engrossing look at the reality of being lesbian or gay and a parent, the ways and means of achieving parenthood, and the benefits and challenges of pink parenting in 90s Britain. Based on original interviews with a broad cross-section of lesbian and gay parents, and their children, this account is proof positive that queer parents are making no “pretence” at creating successful new patterns of family relationships. Among the issues examined are: the taboos and myths that traditionally surround same-sex parenthood; artificial insemination; surrogate mothers; adoption and fostering; custody battles; what to tell the children; what to tell your neighbours; what kids think of their queer parents.

THE TEACHERS’ REPORT
THE TEACHERS’ REPORT Image

Homophobic bullying in Britain’s schools

Stonewall

(Download PDF)

Anti-Bullying Alliance
The experiences of young gay people in Britain’s schools Stonewall
Heterosexual Partners
The Other Side of the Closet: the coming out crisis for straight spouses and families
The Other Side of the Closet: the coming out crisis for straight spouses and families Image

Amity Pierce Buxton

Candid, compassionate, authoritative––a rich source of insights, information, and practical guidance. “The first major work on the topic.” ––Gay Community News “A much needed comprehensive study of what happens to husbands, wives, and children during the coming–out crisis. ––The Reverend Jane E. Vennard, founder Task Force for Spouses of Gays and Lesbians “The new enlarged edition adds important factors, especially children′s reactions to a parent′s coming out. Well–researched and insightful.” ––Fritz Klein, M.D., author of The Bisexual Option “Anybody practicing in this area would be well advised to read this book.” ––Professor Arthur S. Leonard, New York Law School In two million marriages, one spouse is gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Having a spouse or parent disclose his or her same–sex attraction is a shattering experience fraught with pain, confusion, anger, and a profound loss of self–esteem. Amity Pierce Buxton spotlights this exploding phenomenon and reports constructive coping strategies that spouses and children have used to resolve problems of sexual damage,

Homo/Transphobic Hate Crime
Homophobic Hate Crime
Homophobic Hate Crime Image

The Gay British Crime Survey 2011

(Download PDF)

Homophobic Hate Crime
Homophobic Hate Crime Image

The Gay British Crime Survey 2008

(Download PDF)

BULLYING Preventing the bullying and harassment of gay employees
Challenging homophobic language
Blow the Whistle on Gay Hate
Housing
The Housing Guide for lesbian, gay and bisexual people
The Housing Guide for lesbian, gay and bisexual people Image

This guide provides an introduction to housing rights for lesbian, gay and bisexual people. It provides information about renting accommodation, your rights as a tenant and what to do if you are at risk of becoming homeless or you are homeless. The guide will also be useful if you are a worker or a family member who is offering support to a lesbian, gay or bisexual person.

(Download PDF)

International
International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association
International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association Image
  • ILGA-Europe is the European Region of the International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans & Intersex Association
  • ILGA-Europe works for equality and human rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans & intersex (LGBTI) people at the European level
  • ILGA-Europe is an international non-governmental umbrella organisation bringing together 391 organisations from 45 of the 49 countries in Europe
  • ILGA-Europe was established as a separate region of ILGA and an independent legal entity in 1996. ILGA was established in 1978
  • ILGA-Europe advocates for human rights and equality for LGBTI people at the European level, before organisations such as the European Union (EU), the Council of Europe (CoE) and the Organisation for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE)
  • ILGA-Europe strengthens the European LGBTI movement by providing trainings and support to its member organisations and other LGBTI groups on lobbying, advocacy, fundraising, litigation, organisational development and communications
  • ILGA-Europe has its office in Brussels – look here for its current staff members.
  • ILGA-Europe is a member of Social Platform, the largest civil society alliance fighting for social justice and participatory democracy in Europe
  • Since 1997 ILGA-Europe enjoys participative status at the Council of Europe
  • Since 2001 ILGA-Europe receives its largest funding from the European Commission
  • Since 2006 ILGA-Europe enjoys consultative status at the Economic and Social Council of the United Nations (ECOSOC) and therefore also advocates for equality and human rights of LGBTI people at the UN level.
Intersex
Hermaphrodites and the Medical Invention of Sex
Hermaphrodites and the Medical Invention of Sex Image

Dreger, Alice Domurat. 1998

.

Cambridge: Harvard University Press.

 

Alice Dreger, Assistant Professor of Science and Technology Studies at Michigan State University and adjunct faculty at the Center for Ethics and Humanities in the Life Sciences, brings us this study of how and why medical and scientific men have construed sex, gender, and sexuality as they have.

A 36 page long epilogue contains narratives of intersexuals treated according to the still-standard medical protocols developed in the 1950s and calls for change: “Surely, …it will be familiarity rather than knowledge that finally takes away [intersexuals’] supposed ‘strangeness.'” Harvard University Press, 1998.

Collection of Emi Koyama's commentaries on social and ethical issues surrounding intersexuality
Collection of Emi Koyama

Collection of Emi Koyama’s commentaries on social and ethical issues surrounding intersexuality.
Includes “A Letter to Intersex Society of North America” and other critiques written from critical disability theory perspectives.

A Speaker's Handbook
A Speaker

Compiled by Emi Koyama for the Speaker’s Bureau of Intersex Initiative.
Includes sections on intersex basics, speaking basics, and speaking about intersex specifically.

Teaching Intersex Issues
Teaching Intersex Issues Image

Created by Emi Koyama for Intersex Initiative
Designed for instructors of Women’s Studies and related fields. Second edition (Oct. 2003)

Includes syllabus from Intersex Studies course taught at Portland State University.

Ethics and Intersex
Ethics and Intersex Image

Sharon E. Sytsma
Springer Science & Business Media (2006)

This collection of 21 articles is designed to serve as a state-of-the art reference book for intersexuals, their parents, health care professionals, ethics committee members, and anyone interested in problems associated with intersexuality. It fills an important need because of its uniqueness as an interdisciplinary effort, bringing together not just urologists and endocrinologists, but gynecologists, psychiatrists, psychologists, lawyers, theologians, gender theorists, medical historians, and philosophers. Most contributors are well-known experts on intersexuality in their respective fields. The book is also unique in that it is also an international effort, including authors from England, the Netherlands, Germany, Australia, India, Canada and the United States.

Intersex and Identity: The Contested Self
Intersex and Identity: The Contested Self Image

Sociologist Sharon Preves explores how people with intersex conditions experience and cope with being labeled sexual deviants in a society that demands sexual conformity. By demonstrating how intersexed people manage and create their own identities, often in conflict with their medical diagnosis, Preves shows that medical intervention into intersexuality often creates, rather than mitigates, the stigma these people suffer.

Handbook for Parents
Handbook for Parents Image

Consortium on the Management of Disorders of Sex Differentiation (2006)
Intersex Society of North America, Rohnert Park
cover of Handbook for Parents
Written in plain language, the book offers background information on child development, how to talk with the child and others about his or her DSD, and reproducible information pages to give family and others important in the child’s world.
Common questions are answered, and the handbook provides guidance for preparing parents and the child for doctor’s appointments and the value of keeping a journal.
Especially insightful are the generously shared thoughts and experiences of other parents and of adults with DSDs.

Fool for Love
Fool for Love Image

Carys has never willingly worn a dress and Jami, who has, is intersexed. Teenage love is never easy, but for Carys and Jami love is an often terrifying journey in self-discovery and trust.
The novel contains several very emotional scenes, but no graphic sexual content. There is a little strong language at times when people are really upset, but nothing out of line with other books in the young adult coming of age / coming out category.

Paediatric and Adolescent Gynaecology: A Multidisciplinary Approach
Paediatric and Adolescent Gynaecology: A Multidisciplinary Approach Image

2014 Providing a wide-ranging overview of developmental anomalies, disorders and intersex conditions, this textbook presents the best possible advice and practical recommendations concerning medical intervention. With its multidisciplinary approach to health care, the book will be recommended reading for specialists in paediatric and adolescent gynaecology, reproductive endocrinologists, paediatric and plastic surgeons, and clinical geneticists

Clinical Guidelines for the Management of Disorders of Sex Development in Childhood
Clinical Guidelines for the Management of Disorders of Sex Development in Childhood Image

Clinical Guidelines for the Management of Disorders of Sex Development in Childhood is a handbook for health care professionals who provide care to pediatric patients with Disorders of Sex Development. It is also a valuable resource for health professional students, educators, parents of children with DSDs, and adults with DSDs.

Chrysalis Special Issue on Intersexuality (1997) This special issue of Chrysalis: Journal of Transgressive Gender Identities is guest-edited by intersex activists and is completely devoted to addressing intersex issue
Chrysalis Special Issue on Intersexuality (1997)  This special issue of Chrysalis: Journal of Transgressive Gender Identities is guest-edited by intersex activists and is completely devoted to addressing intersex issue Image
  • From the Editors
  • (Not) Another Clit Story
  • Caught Between: An Essay on Intersexuality
  • Doctors Containing Hermaphrodites: The Victorian Legacy
  • Finding the Words
  • Growing up in the Surgical Maelstrom
  • Hermaphrodites with Attitude Take to the Streets
  • In Amerika They Call Us Hermaphrodites
  • In Process
  • Interview with Dr. Arika Aiert
  • Is Growing up in Silence Better Than Growing up Different?
  • Letter to My Physicians
  • Meanings of Gender Variability Constructs of Sex and Gender
  • My Beautiful Clitoris
  • News Release: American Academy of Pediatrics Position on Intersexuality
  • Ode to a Life (Poem)
  • Porno Docs
  • Power, Orgasm, And the Psychohormonal Research Unit
  • Showering “Sans Penis”
  • Silence = Death
  • Take Charge! A Guide to Home Catheterization
  • The Murk Manual: How to Understand Medical Writing on Intersex
  • Time for a Change
  • What dream? (Poem)
As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as A Girl By: John Colapinto Pubs:Deckle Edge (2000)
As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as A Girl  By: John Colapinto Pubs:Deckle Edge (2000) Image

In 1967, after a baby boy suffered a botched circumcision, his family agreed to a radical treatment. On the advice of a renowned expert in gender identity and sexual reassignment at Johns Hopkins Hospital, the boy was surgically altered to live as a girl. This landmark case, initially reported to be a complete success, seemed all the more remarkable since the child had been born an identical twin: his uninjured brother, raised as a boy, provided to the experiment the perfect matched control

IntersexCritiques II: Medicine, Media and Intersex Movement
IntersexCritiques II: Medicine, Media and Intersex Movement Image

Second collection of Emi Koyama’s commentaries on social and ethical issues surrounding intersexuality.
This volume examines media reports on “brain sex” discoveries, cultural considerations on intersex treatment, and other interesting and bizarre things that are said about intersex.

Kink/BDSM
Safe, Sane, and Consensual - Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism
Safe, Sane, and Consensual - Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism Image

Edited by Darren Langdridge and Meg Barker. Palgrave Macmillian, 2007

Key Elements: Using contributions from different authors in each chapter this book explores all of the elements of sadomasochism. Historical, psychological, social, and transcendental perspectives on sadomasochism are given from the points of views of contributing authors who have experienced it and/or approach the topic from a non judgmental and informative point of view.

Part One- Introducing Sadomasochism

Chapter One-Situating Sadomasochism
Highlights historical psychological perspective of evaluating sadomasochism. Still classified as a psychological disorder by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the Psychiatric Association. (DSM-IV). It rests alongside child sexual abuse and rape as an individual sexual pathology. This chapter explores how throughout the book sadomasochism (S/M) is being evaluated by different academics, post feminist social scientist, psychologists, and others. The terminology and structure of the book are both also explained in this chapter.
Chapter Two-The Cultural Formation of Sadomasochism. History and Analysis
This chapter looks at S/M as part of a wider cultural context that includes sexual cultural evaluation. It defines sexual culture theory, sexual culture function model, and sexual culture formation model. It also contains a historical overview of S/M practice. S/M is defined using a broad perspective that includes consent, erotism, and interpersonal interactions, the dynamics of power and a cultural evaluation of S/M throughout history starting from the 1600s. This chapter also contains a summary of S/M’s role in contemporary culture and the role that S/M plays in industrial society.
Chapter Three- Themes of S/M Expression
Explores the following topics:
Roles
Those that are dominant, “top”,”master”,”mistress”,”owner”,”dominatrix” and those that are submissive, “slave”,”bottom”,”property”, “property” ,”owned”
Commonalities
Negotiation and setting limits, hard limits, soft limits, and how to negotiate is part of the relationship building including the five common features of S/M Bondage
How it is used as a method of power by limiting the movement of a partner, how bondage is used with clothing, how bandage is used on specific parts of the body, where the bondage takes place and what is used
Discipline
Both psychological and physical Dominance and Submission what goes between the individuals who are dominant and those who are submissive, how the roles are used in sexual acts and the various relationships that can form between those playing the different roles
Symbols
The symbols used in S/M relationships including piercing, collars, being marked, it mentions contracts, and tattooing
Physical Pain
The pain in the context of an S/M relationships, and the role of “intensity”, different types of pain, “stingy” or “thuddy” types of stimulation and body parts bruising, branding, and tattooing are also discussed.
Humiliation
How the different forms of humiliation vary from person to person, the different forms of humiliation and how types of humiliation can change from time to time and the “cuckholding” or “cuck”
Fetishes
Sexual arousal to an inanimate object, the common objects, objects, and body parts
Relationships
The different types of S/M relationship that exist – dominant and passive, dominant and dominant, male submissive, couples, the use of a permanent third partner through “V” where one partner has sex with two individuals who do not have sex with each other or through “Δ” where three partners have sex with each other.
Chapter Four – Is SM Pathological
This chapter tries to answer the question of whether or not S/M is pathological and it looks at the parameters being used to define “normal” sexual relationships. S/M is measured against the DSM IV criteria, the legal complications of S/M, and the relationships of those who engage in S/M. Chapter Five- Sadomasochism and The Law The legal context of S/M and the law, the law and bodily harm, autonomy and consent, and privacy rights.

Part Two – Theorizing Pain and Injury

Chapter Six – Speaking the Unspeakable: S/M and the Eroticization of Pain
The focus of this chapter is to identify the possible relationships between pain and pleasure. Is there a shared or common language used to express pain? Is torture the only context of pain?
Chapter Seven-The Bodily Practices of Consensual S/M, Spirituality and Transcendence
The relationship between S/M and the wider socio-cultural phenomena includes mysticism and spirituality in a cultural historic context this section is drawn from the chapter’s author thesis. The transcendent sexual experience is mentioned. Grounded theory has been used in many of the works sighted. The link between S/M and sexual practices in order to achieve spiritual liberation is also explored. The chapter attempts to emphasis the spiritual transcendental elements of consensual S/M.
Chapter Eight- Beyond Safety: Erotic Asphyxiation (E/A) and the Limits of S/M Discourse (asphyxiophilia, hypoxyphilia, breath play or breath control play)
E/A and pushing sexual boundaries is base of the chapter and it looks at what others in the S/M community thinks about E/A. The questions of whether it is too dangerous or too destructive is explored and what the S/M community thinks of E/A.

Part Three Empirical Research

Chapter Nine – Sexual Fantasies of S/M Practitioners: The Impact of Gender and S/M Role on Fantasy Context
Sexual fantasies are acknowledged as a healthy element of sexuality and this chapter explores the relationship between S/M and sexual fantasy. Freud and Jung are mentioned and the argument that S/M includes elements of Carl Jung’s theory of the unconscious into sexual play. S/M as a tool to actualize fantasy is outlined that includes research that explores power and S/M roles, fantasies, gender and sexual scripts, power, and pleasure

Chapter Ten – On Becoming a Gay SMer: A Sexual Scripting Perspective
This chapter looks at how someone becomes a gay SMer. How the initial awareness is transformed into live gay SM interactions. Sexual scripting is mentioned (the formation of an individuals sexual identity) of which there are three parts: “intrapsychic”,”interpersonal”,”cultural scenarios”. Finally it discusses whether or not there is a single pattern or process in becoming a gay SMer.
Chapter Eleven- Playgrounds and New Territories: The Potential of BDSM Practices to Queer Genders
(BDSM is a broader term which stands for bondage, discipline, domination, submission, and sadomasochism)
This chapter is an analysis of the complex power structure BDSM/Queer Genders through explanation of the following: the dyke+BDSM communities in Western Europe and the USA the queering genders in the dyke + BDSM communities queer playgrounds exploring gender (through roles and fantasy) the expansion of the concept of gender or genderfucking creating sub-cultural skills through renaming/reassigning recognition, and integration It concludes with the yuppie consumption of S/M culture.

Part Four – Therapeutic Perspectives

Chapter 12 – The Power of Play: The Potential and Pitfalls in Healing of BDSM
The representation of BDSM in mainstream Western countries is evidenced in sexual stories. This chapter explores how BDSM can function as a healing narrative; BDSM is explored as a source of therapeutic value through looking at the emerging healing narrative of BDSM. The potential constraints of BDSM as a healing narrative are also discussed.
Chapter 13- Shadowplay: S/M Journeys to Our Selves
A personal account of S/M play and a journey from abuse to healing by having used S/M role playing based on Jung’s theories
Chapter 14 – Some Beneficial Aspects of Exploring
Personas and Role Play in the BDSM Context Defining the three salient definitions of BDSM role, persona, and archetype. The risks of role playing are also covered.

Part Five – Bridging the Academic/Activist Divide

Chapter 15 – CARAS: An Initiative to Link Alternative Sexually Communities and Academic Researches
(CARAS is Community-Academic Consortium for Research on Alternative Sexualities) The objectives, methodology, analysis, and results of the organization are discussed in this chapter. This chapter also includes how CARAS works to address bias in research; the chapter provides background information on the organization and its role in opening a discussion around bias in sexual research through closing the gap between alternative sexual communities and the academic research community.
Chapter 16-Turning the World Upside Down: Developing a Tool for Training about S/M
This chapter is about working past the blocks that we have regarding S/M through exploring the norms and cultural perspectives of S/M.
Chapter 17- Who Is In Charge in an S/M SCENE?
The focus on this chapter is the power structure in the BDSM world, and includes three different parts Experiences of a Pro-Domme How to conduct a professional S/M session from beginning to end Total Power Exchange in a Modern Family A personal perspective on S/M in a wider cultural context.

Ties that Bind - The SM/Leather/Fetish Erotic Style. Issues, Commentaries, and Advice
Ties that Bind - The SM/Leather/Fetish Erotic Style. Issues, Commentaries, and Advice Image

Guy Baldwin, MS. Daedalus Publishing, 1993

Key Elements: The book is written for those men who have already undertaken leather/SM lifestyle and would like to additional insight into the leather/SM lifestyle.

The book is a collection of essays that the author previously published in magazines and journals (Drummer, Checkmate, The Leather Journal, Manifest Reader). It is divided into four parts that focus on different aspects of the leather/SM identity.

Part One: The Relationship Essays

Relationships with others, and self are discussed, how to maintain a romantic leather/SM relationship, group relationships, slave and master relationships, the role of the scene in a healthy relationship, and problem solving solutions are all covered.

Part Two: The Community Commentaries Essays
The importance of family, communities and interacting segments as part of a complete social network, also covered is being part of a group, the essays mention attire and norms for the leather/SM community, family, politics in the leather community, along with leather beauties and leather beast are covered.

Part Three: On Enhancing the SM Experience

Sexual communication, communicating about safer sex, sexual play, the exchanges between tops and bottoms, top behaviour, bottom behaviour, consent, communication and negotiation, recreational drug use, humiliation, punishment and guidelines for emotional safety when connecting with the SM scene and are covered.

Part Four: Catapulting towards Transformation
Pushing limits for bottoms, how bottoms out number tops and the reasons why and the spiritual element of SM are covered.

SM 101 - A Realistic Introduction
SM 101 - A Realistic Introduction Image

Jay Wiseman. Greenery Press, 1996

Key Elements: covers everything you need to know about getting started or exploring SM, also there is an entertaining thought related to SM on every page it is a realistic introduction to SM

Preliminaries

Contains the purpose of the book, why the book is being written
Sexual extremes (what’s going too far)
Who is this book for? (Primarily for the person who has yet contact the SM community, the book in gender neutral and includes basic and advanced SM
What is SM? (Who is defining it)?
Is SM for you? (Those who are self-motivated towards SM and the other motivated people)
Why on earth would anybody want to do this stuff in the first place? (Covers curiosity and limbic system)
People against SM and the psychology of masochism, not harming self and not harming others
A tough decision (writing and publishing about SM)
Coming out (the author’s own SM coming out story)
The sociology, politics, and economics of SM
SM versus abuse
Warning signals (how to know when a relationship is abusive)
The cycle of violence (when emotions reach the boiling point and abuse happens)

Basic Basics
Consent (one of the most important issues)
The silent alarm (protecting yourself against that very dangerous one percent of the population)
Safe words (the signal that the play is becoming too intense)
The ethics of safe words (the number one safety measure)
Nonverbal safe words
Checking in (verbal and non-verbal)
Negotiation (failure to negotiate well is the single most common cause of a bad SM session, the 16 basic points that a good basic SM negotiation should cover, includes pre-session negotiations, group negotiations, post session negotiation and feedback, a sample of negotiation
Variability (how different people react)
Learning how it feels (testing it on yourself for yourself)
Setting the scene (time, cleanliness, equipment preparation, privacy)
Other matters (smell, taste, clocks and watches, urinal, the telephone)
Finding a Partner.
Personal ads, Writing and placing an ad, Personal ads in cyberspace, SM clubs, Sign and signals, Men looking for women (personal ads in sex magazines, recognising and dealing with letter freaks personal ads in swingers magazines, personal ads in singles papers, finding a partner on your own, single bars, dating services), Women looking for women, Men looking men , Introducing SM into an existing relationship (includes three role plays to get started)

Bondage 1A (includes diagrams)
Some basic bondage principles, Types of rope (marking the midpoint, lengths, storing rope), Knots (the square knot. The surgeon’s knot, the running loop, tying off the end, the lark’s head, obi knot, cinch loops), Basic bondage techniques, (Tying the wrists, tying the ankles, tying the knees, tying the elbows), Shoulder pain in a bound submissive, Lark’s head bondage, The restraint knot, Breast bondage, Genital bondage, Binding the female genitals, Binding the male genitals, Binding the cock, The hogtie position (the basic hogtie, the military hogtie, hogtie alternative, hogtie variations), Using a bar as bondage implement (how to lash wrists to a bar), Tying a submissive to the bed, Notes and hints on bondage, First bondage, Precautions when playing in isolated areas, Self-bondage, On being untied,

Bondage 1B
Gags (types of gags, panty gags), Blindfolds (when to use a blindfold, notes on using blindfolds, blindfold material), Earplugs, Hoods, Handcuffs (a note about handcuff quality, thumb cuffs, leg irons), Leather cuffs, Suspension, Chains, locks, etc. (chain safety measures, padlocks, how to deal with the different keys needed for each lock, special links, carabiners, double snaps, ribbon, tape, plastic wrap),

Giving and Receiving Erotic Pain
What is pain, Giving pain (the nod, the now), How hard should I hit (one to ten), Receiving pain, Straight time and checking in later,

Flagellation
When to whip, What about whipping her breast, Whipping positions (the standing position, the bent-at-the-waist position, the prone position, beware of ‘neck snap’, watch for internal injury, take care of your own body too, the pillowcase), Hands-on-flagellation (spanking and a few spanking tips), Paddling (and the slapper), The riding crop (how to use a riding crop), Whips and floggers (single tailed whips, multi-tailed whips, how to make a ‘mini-flogger’ from two bootlaces, backhand, twirling, sideways figure eight, underhand, from in front, overhand, snapping, holding the tails) Canes (and a few words about the lovely coat hanger), The pounder (a message implement that consist of a small ball mounted on a flexible strip of metal with a handle on the other hand)

Clamps (a lazy dominant’s best friend) Putting them on, Taking them off, What to do after the clamp is on, Standing clamps, The bed of nails, Clamping the nipples (applying clamps to nipples, where should you place the nipple clamps), Clamping the genitals (clamping the male genitals, clamping the female genitals), Clamping other parts of the body,

Lubricants, Erotic ‘Torture’, Using your hands and mouth, Hot and cold play, Candle wax, menthol play, hair blower, ice cubes, Conventional sex toys (vibrator, ben wa balls), Other forms of sensation (abrasion play, semi-piercing,’ play piercing’, suction cups, electricty play, blade play), Masturbation games (hooker’s trick number 1, brush strokes, pin in the skin, tap dancing, climbing the mountain, push here to start, flat top, ‘show me how you like it’, thumb enchanted evening, a hair-raising trick, fill her up, perineum punch, make a sanke, up and down 1, up and down 2, sexual feeling, do the twist, a moveable fist, open says me, a one a two and a three, trident, give him a wring, close but no cigar, ball pull, tes tickles, pin and win, before and after, milking it for all it’s worth, jilting off, a warm wet touch

Humiliation (the most difficult SM related subject to understand and agree upon)

Dominant/Submissive Interactions
On being a dominant, On being a submissive (pushy bottoms, smart assed masochist-SAM, resistance, topping from below), Beginning and ending a session, Beginning a submissive training, The four basic duties of a submissive (to serve your needs, to obey your orders, to accept your domination, to please your desires), The collar (an instrument of ownership and control), Basic position training (keeping things in perspective, commands), Speech training (the submissive should usually speak only when directly spoken to or after being given permission to speak), Slave duties, Punishment,

SM Relationships
24/7 relationships (ethics, can inequality and intimacy co-exist?), Non-traditional partnerships

SM Organisations
(finding your local community, etiquette, when there is no local community, gender balance, social meetings, programs) Parties (deciding to put on a party, who will do what) More formal organisational structures

General Safety Considerations

Musing on safety, SM and risk, What about leaving marks, SM during pregnancy (emotional changes, sexual changes, important cautions), Common causes of SM disasters, First aid and CPR training, First aid supplies, Common SM emergencies (loss of emotional balance, freak outs, falls, fainting, what if the dominant faints, sudden loss of electrical power), Safety checklist
SM and Safer Sex
A Novice Woman’s Quick Reference Guide to Erotically Dominating a Submissive Man
SM Sayings
Related Practices
(Age play, anal play, bisexuality, breath control, circumcision, cauretry, enemas, fetishism, Gay and lesbian resources, non-monogamous relationships, piercing, cutting and branding, prostitute support groups, tantric sex, transvestism, and transexuality
Finding Help with Problems
(Where and how to find local resources)
References and Resources

Sadomasochism - Powerful Pleasures
Sadomasochism - Powerful Pleasures Image

Peggy J. Kleinplatz, PhD. and Charles Moser, PhD, MD, editors. Harrington Park Press, 2006
(co-published simultaneously as Journal of Homosexuality, Volume 50, Numbers 2/3 2006)


Key Elements:
The essays in this book take a hard look at SM from a clinical research perspective and would interest anyone who would like to understand more about the topic from a researcher’s point of view.

Introduction:
The State of Our Knowledge on SM. An overview of what is currently known about SM
Sadomasochism and the Social Sciences. A Review of the Sociological and Social Psychological Literature. the characteristics and the identity of the sadomasochistic subculture is briefly summarised
Differences and Similarities Between Gay and Straight Individual Involved in the Sadomasochistic Subculture. Focuses primarily on heterosexual and homosexual males and the sexual themes that were identified in the two groups
Sexual Spanking, the Self and the Construction of Deviance. Using interviews and observations of consensual heterosexual adults who are interested in sexual spanking, their sexual stories and stigma neutralisation techniques are summarised to show how their sexual stories are placed in a wider cultural context that helps those who practice spanking construct meaning, and build identities
24/7 SM Slavery. Using an on line questionnaire are described in this study of people who are living as 24/7 SM slaves
Mainstream Kink: The Politics of BDSM. Representation in U.S. Popular Media
Covers the way in which BDSM is viewed by the mainstream U.S. media, its representation is contrasted with the sexual norms of American culture
Understanding Sadomasochism: An Empirical Examination of Four Perspectives. Taking the findings of four different studies this article looks into what motivates ‘Tops’ and ‘Bottoms’ to participate in SM, contrasting the finds of the study and drawing the conclusion that expressions of power is the motivating factor behind the participation in SM and not giving and receiving pain
The Spanner Trials and the Changing Law on Sadomasochism in the U.K. Using the outcome of the Spanner Trials as a starting point to explore the issues of a consent and privacy as they relate to the practice of SM under British and European law. The difference is the perception of SM under the law when applied to gay men and heterosexual couples is also covered.
Negotiating Limits: The Legal Status of SM in the United States. The origin of SM and how it is treated by the American legal system
Discrimination of SM-Identified Individual. A summary of the discrimination, harassment and physical attacks that are suffered by individual identified as practicing SM
Sadomasochistic Interest as an Issue in a Child Custody Proceeding. How a mother’s practice of SM affected her child custody battle, includes the cost that leading an alternative lifestyle can have in a child custody battle and what can happen when the DSM-IV is misused
The International Classification of Diseases of Fetishism and Sadomasochism
. How sexual deviation is psychiatrically diagnosed and how it appears in the ICD-10
SM International . SM in Brazil, Germany, Canada, Switzerland, Norway are written about including some contact details for groups in those countries
Psychotherapeutic Issues with ‘Kinky’ Clients: Clinical Problems, Yours and Theirs. From a BDSM affirmative point of view the author looks at the negative perspective of BDSM that some psychotherapist may have BDSM practices
Investigating Bias in Psychotherapy with BDSM Clients. The concerns of the BDSM practitioners who received psychological care are documented in an on line survey and the findings are evaluated
Learning from Extraordinary Lovers: Lessons from the Edge. What clinicians are able to learn from the individual who have sex lives that vary from normal heterosexual intercourse and the differences between their sex lives and normal heterosexual ones

Sadomasochism - Painful Perversion or Pleasurable Play
Sadomasochism - Painful Perversion or Pleasurable Play Image

Bill Thompson. Cassell Publishers, 1994

Key Elements: Written by a criminologist this book shows the modern history and traces the beginning of modern sadomasochism.

Introduction – Spanner, The Non-Existent Crime
This chapter details the case that put the spotlight on sadomasochism, the law (at the time) and what the author hopes to achieve in the text.

Chapter One – Sadomasochism
In this chapter what is in the name of sadomasochism and the work of Richard von Krafft-Ebing (1840-1902) and the work of Iwan Bloch (1872-1922) and the impact that it had or did not have in defining sadomasochism.

Chapter Two – Psychobabble
This chapter further explores the theories of sadomasochism including Freud and drawing the line between sadomasochism and sadism, the origins of sadomasochism are covered in ‘Where do sadomasochists come from’.

Chapter Three – Popular Fallacies and Fears
The chapter looks at modern images of violence that are not perceived as violent, Mary Whitehouse, and the Christian view of sadomasochism, psychotherapy theories, and feminist separatist, and what all these views have in common.

Chapter Four- Sense and Psychologists
The difference of opinions of psychiatrists and psychologists and others regarding sadomasochism.

Chapter Five- Defending the Indefensible
In the chapter the role of sociologist in defining sadomasochism, the first major German study into the matter, a study into the American sadomasochism scene, the link to role plays, learning the ropes, pain and the gay scene, leather bars, slaves and masters (a New York study), becoming a sadomasochist and the sociology of sadomasochism

Chapter Six- The Fantasy Factory
The chapter details intellectualizing sex and why we intellectualize sex, fantasy, common fantasies and their link to sadomasochism recorded in ‘A taste for Pain’ (1981), and the important role of fantasy in sadomasochism, including a brief history of sadomasochism and how it relates to fantasy in popular culture.

Chapter Seven-Criminalizing Sadomasochism
Much is covered in this chapter, the issue of assault (the three types of assault), the definition of consent, the defence against criminalization, the court of appeal judgment, the law lords judgment, the Attorney-Generals Reference, and how all of the above was linked to gays, Satanism, and sex rings.

Chapter Eight- Mastering Slavery

The chapter focuses on sadomasochism as a question of sport and as a question of sex, bondage, the policing of sadomasochism and the law commission that investigated sadomasochism

On The Safe Edge - A Manual for SM Play
On The Safe Edge - A Manual for SM Play Image

Trevor Jacques with Dr.Dale, Michael Hamilton, and Sniffer. WholeSM Publishing Corporation, 1993

Key Elements:
A complete manual for all things related to SM, it references to a wide range of SM topics.

The books covers the following:

What is SM?
And a few things that it is not, it is not sexual masochism, it is not sexual sadism, and it is not a mental disorder
Coming Out Into SM. Why; the inside drive to do it, How; coming out to others and meeting others, Social- local, national, bars, networking, phone lines, Publications, Computer Bulletin Boards, Professional Dominants, etc.

The Mind
Fantasy and Reality – Imagination and creativity
Fantasy – With whom do we want to play, what forms could play take, where do we like to play, when would we like to play, how do we play, why do we do it
Reality – The main parts of the real world that can play a part in modifying a fantasy, safety respect and consideration for others, you can’t always have all you want, fantasy may be more than reality can handle, punishment reality can mean facing truths about oneself
Creativity – Create a scenario and then work on how to enact it
Roles – Dominant and submissive, sadistic and masochistic, aggressive and passive, top and bottom-who is which, acting out a role for a scene, living a role (the degree and extent of role plays), role reversal (playing the other role)
Responsibilities and other duties – consent (understanding the importance of informed consent)
Responsibilities (who for which, negotiation-making sure that anything that may affect the current scene
is well understood by your partner, who is in charge, top and bottom should establish the scene before hand, bottom must signal wishes to go further, tops must recognise problem)
Trust – (an important ingredient in creating a scene that works)
Panic – (hyperventilation, anticipating panic)
Spiritual and Ritual

The Body
Anatomy – (what takes place beneath the skin) contains illustrations of the male and female body-the difference between the sexes, erogenous zone, percussion, bondage, insertional activities, cock and ball play, electrotorture, physiology, endorphins, threshold of pain.
Play (the mechanics of play)-topics related to SM play, cue (aural cue, visual cue, tactile cue, oral cue, nasal cue), stimulation (aural stimulation, visual stimulation, tactile stimulation, oral stimulation, olfactory stimulation) ramping up and down

Safety
Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Cleanliness and Disinfection – Condoms, dental dams, latex gloves, cleaning of toys, cleaning of people, cleaning the ass for play
Mind Altering Substances – alcohol, amphetamines, barbiturates, cannabis, cocaine and crack, hallucinogens, options, volatile nitrites, volatile solvents
Emotions and the Psyche
First Aid
Reasons and Uses for Pain
Stop the Scene
Incidents -fainting, diabetes reaction
Accidents – bleeding, dislocated joints, fractures, and concussion, damaged ligaments, burns (first degree, second degree, third degree)
First Aid Kit for the Play Room
Safety Considerations-silent alarm, medical conditions

Bondage
Auto bondage, collars, genital bondage, handcuffs, shackles and other mental bondage, hoods, gags, blindfolds, gasmasks, leather, Mummification, rope
Insertional Practices-
Fisting, long-term scenes oral sex, percussion play, aerosolization of blood, scat, water sports and raunch, suspension and inversion, miscellaneous considerations
Equipment- toys (blood letting toys, bondage toys), Genital bondage equipment, chastity belts, cockrings and straps, covers, cages and sheaths, head bondage toys, hospital restraints, mental restraints, mummification, rope toys, cock and ball toys, electrical toys, current devices, voltage devices, insertional toys, catheters and sounds, scat and watersport equipment, suspension and inversion toys, bondage suits, inversion boots, mailbags, slings, suspension, harness, temperature toys, branding, cigarettes, cigars, matches, flaming heat, hot wax, ice, tiger balm, ben gay and other skin stimulants, tit toys, vaginal toys, whips, paddles, rods and other percussive toys and safety items for the playroom
Etiquette (codes of behaviour)-
Honesty, scene is failing, bar etiquette, bedroom etiquette, playroom etiquette

Further Reading and Viewing
Appendix A: Safer sex and drug policies
Appendix B: Group SM courtesy
Appendix C: SM questionnaires
Appendix D: The $35 Toybag
Appendix E: Hanky colour codes
Appendix F: Contact and terms and abbreviations

The New Topping Book
The New Topping Book Image

Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy. Greenery Press, 2003

Key Elements: The entire text takes a proactive positive approach to the exploration of being a ‘Top’ and developing comfortably in the role of ‘Top’. It also contains a resource guide

Chapter One- Hello Again!

Covers the love of Tops, Why the book was written , How the authors view BDSM, (Bondage and sadomasochism), Defining BDSM and how do you know that you are a Top ,

Chapter Two- What Is It About Topping, Anyway?
Details the struggle of power in society, Building your hearth, Asks the question of whether or not all power is the same, ‘What’s in it for you’ (empathy, creativity, bigness, nurturing, bullying, control, competence and self knowledge), ‘What about Bottoms’, How Tops and Bottoms interrelate, (Their interdependence), ‘Whose fantasy’ (the role of fantasy), Symbolism and structure’ (their role in fantasy),

Chapter Three-What Do Tops Do?
Finding your Top persona’ (the various roles that you can play and do you always have to have a role), Where are the boundaries?, The use of safe words?, When you’re itching to go further-when you have a clear picture of what turns you on want to go further, If you’re doing it, it’s real’ (the contradiction and paradox in S/M and reflecting on the ways in which symbolic powerlessness can empower and symbolic cruelty can sensitize)

Interlude 1- A sensation scene at a party played by Janet and a female friend’.

Chapter Four- Rights and Responsibilities
(Your rights and responsibilities as a Top)

Chapter Five- ‘How Do You Learn to Do This Stuff’

(Giving you permission to be ignorant and learn) , Do it yourself’ (basic rules and helpful hints)

Interlude 2- A scene at a party by our friend Bill and a stranger


Chapter Six- ‘Soaring Higher’

Getting the technique out of the way, learning and progressing, Staying open (paying attention to what is happening in your own body and heart, paying attention to muscle tension, paying attention to breathing, paying attention to posture and movement), Intuition and where to find it- the ability to now something without knowing it

Chapter Seven- BDSM Ethnics

How to be safe and healthy while at play violating and betraying, Consent, Respecting and blaming, Hearing feedback , Respecting persons

Chapter Eight- ‘On Your Mark-Get Set.’

Communication skills for Tops, Getting the information that you need, I messages (the importance of using I statements), Needy Bottoms (ways of handling situations with them), Black holes (unresponsive Bottoms), Activities that require special consent (things that may require special consent), Sex (the kinds of sexual behavior that are o.k.), Marks (temporary marks, bruises, or welts), Pains (an acquired taste), Humiliation (what kind he loves or hates), Phobias and turn-offs (psychological phobias, images, or associations), High-risk play (forms of play that have a much higher risk of injury), Limits of scene space (agreeing the limits and gaining consent to go further), Emotional limits (special consent for anything that may evoke strong emotional conflict), Limits for tops (knowing your own limits), Making room for your own needs (where sex and physical stimulation fit in)

Interlude 3- A role-play scene played by ‘Alaska’ a novice top friend

Chapter Nine- Go!

What do you do first?, Getting yourself turned on, Impulse topping, Keeping it going, Taking control, Asking for directions, How to be supportive, Checking in, Calibrating your bottom, Bottomless Pitts (how to handle Bottoms who never seem to get enough), Closure, Winding down

Chapter Ten: ‘And if It Doesn’t Go The Way You Planned’
(How to handle physical mishaps, emergencies, and aftershocks)

Chapter Eleven: ‘Toys for Tops’-A Basic Toy Selection
Rope, restraints, blindfolds, collar, clamps, candles, soft flogger, slapper, or jacket bat, sex toys, safer sex, supplies, emergency supplies; More advanced toys, helplessness toys, toys for hitting, toys for poking, toys that heat or cool, toys that zap, toys for turning on and getting off, toys for role playing; Toys for the road, Maintaining toys, Some final thoughts on toys

Interlude 4- A first time topping scene played by a Bottom and her friends

Chapter Twelve-‘Finding Others’
Common mistakes, Virtual communities, Munches, Leather bars, Support groups, The kink communities and people of color, O.k. but where are all the bottoms, It pays to advertise, To cruise or not to cruise , Introducing BDSM into existing relationship, Choosing the right Bottom, Responsibilities, Ability to give as well as take, Discretion, Self control, Supportiveness

Chapter Thirteen-‘Special Cases’
Novices (BDSM virgins), Professional domination, Public play (playing in public)

Chapter Fourteen-‘Full Time D/S’ (the 24/7’s)

Fluidity (an approach to moving in and out of dominant or submissive mind sets), Activities and behaviors (includes what’s in it for the submissive), Contracts and symbols , The duration of the contract, Symbols (collars, rings), Obligations (services provided by the submissive and services provided by the dominant), Ways to communicate (creative ways to accomplish communication), Agreements about sex and play with others (activities that may or may not take place outside the relationship), Disagreements (how will they be handled)

Chapter Fifteen-‘Shadow Play: Dark side S/M’
What is it (scenes that delve into deep psychological territory)?, Playing in the shadow, Playing with cultural trauma (what is the attraction from the Bottom if you choose a script, what is the attraction from the Top if you choose to a script), How do you do it (aftercare, public play, healing), Deep emotional safety (setting and keeping to limits), How do you do it (beginning, middle, and ending), What about therapy (does the Top become the therapist in deep psychological play), Shadows and rebirth (finding acceptance for emotions and behaviors that would be unacceptable outside the BDSM scene)

Chapter Sixteen-‘S/M Spirituality: From the Top’
Shadow and spirit, S/M ritual as a spiritual path, Edge path (whenever things start to feel risky), Roles in ritual (training yourself and developing your own spiritual practice), Ritual practice (doing ritual successfully), Planning and negotiating , Power and manifestation ,

Chapter Seventeen-‘The Light That Shines In The Darkness’
(the darkness of BDSM that leads to light)

Lesbian Life
The Whole Lesbian Sex Book
The Whole Lesbian Sex Book Image

Felice Newman

Prescription for Change
Prescription for Change Image

Lesbian and bisexual women’s health check 2008

(free booklet to download)

Lesbians and Psychoanalysis: Revolutions in Theory and Practice
Lesbians and Psychoanalysis: Revolutions in Theory and Practice Image

Edited by Judith M. Glassgold
Simon and Schuster. 1995.

Psychoanalytic theories of lesbian development epitomize the difficulty in liberating psychoanalysis from the past. Psychoanalytic theory has traditionally adopted a clear position that a lesbian orientation represented some form of psychological abnormality. Thankfully– but only very recently– some influential feminist leaders have begun to rethink issues of gender and sexual orientation, removing heterosexuality from its privileged position as normal. In “Lesbians and Psychoanalysis”, Judith M. Glassgold and Suzanne Iasenza bring together twenty-six of these pioneers in the field of lesbian psychoanalytic theory. Through insightful chapters based on years of clinical experience, each author helps to redefine psychoanalytic theory by reinventing its foundations from an affirmative perspective so that it better represents all peoples.

“Lesbians and Psychoanalysis” addresses several topics of emerging concern including multicultural diversity, self-disclosure, homophobia, transference/countertransference issues, bisexuality, and the changing nature of lesbian sexuality. In addition, the authors examine the influence of stigma on human development. In three sections– Past, Present, and Future– the authors in turn critique past theory, discuss current issues in therapy, and describe new directions in theory and practice. This is a book that is sure to appeal not only to members of the psychoanalytic community but also to all those who are interested in gay and lesbian studies, feminism, and psychology.

Mental Health
Mental health issues within lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) communities
Mental health issues within lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) communities Image

Briefings for health and social care staff

(Download PDF)

NHS and Healthcare
Being the gay one:
Being the gay one: Image

Experiences of lesbian, gay and bisexual people working in the health and social care sector

(Download PDF)

Working with lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans (LGBT) people
Reducing health inequalities for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people
Lesbian health
Healthy lifestyles for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans (LGBT) people
Improving access to health and social care for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans (LGBT) people
Lesbian Health F.A.Q.
Invisible Women
Invisible Women Image

A Review of the Impact of Discrimination and Social Exclusion on Lesbian and Bisexual women’s health in Northern Ireland

(Download PDF)
(Download PDF executive summary)

Improving Health Care for the Lesbian and Gay Communities
Prescription for Change
Prescription for Change Image

Lesbian and bisexual women’s health check 2008

(Download PDF)

Older GSD
Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Identities over the Lifespan: Psychological Perspectives
Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Identities over the Lifespan: Psychological Perspectives Image

Anthony R. D’Augelli and Charlotte J. Patterson
OUP USA. 1996.

Over the last fifteen years, psychological research regarding sexual orientation has seen explosive growth. In this book, Anthony R. D’Augelli and Charlotte J. Patterson bring together top experts to offer a comprehensive overview of what we have discovered – and what we still need to learn – about lesbian, gay, and bisexual identities. Writing in clear, nontechnical language, the contributors cover a range of topics, including conceptions of sexual identity, development over the lifespan, family and other personal relationships, parenting, and bigotry and discrimination. Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Identities Over the Lifespan is essential reading for researchers, students, social scientists, mental health practitioners, and general readers who seek the most up-to-date and authoritative treatment of the subject available.

Later life as an Older Lesbian, Gay or Bisexual person.
Older lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) people
Caregiving
Caregiving Image

Among Older Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Newyorkers

(Download PDF)

Not safe for us yet
Not safe for us yet Image

The experiences and views of older lesbians, gay men and bisexuals using mental health services in London.

(Executive Summary)

(Download PDF)

Sexuality and older people
Sexuality and older people Image

Doctors should ask patients, regardless of age, about sex

(Download PDF)

LESBIAN, GAY BISEXUAL PEOPLE in later life
Parents/Parenting
I Want to Have a Child, Whatever it Takes!
I Want to Have a Child, Whatever it Takes! Image

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Carmen presents in her autobiography the problem of infertility representing it through images of her paintings, paintings that touch the heart of the reader. After telling the story of the constant struggle between doctors and syringes, the author decides to paint chairs as a way of relief, chairs that express each one of her longings, each moment of sadness, each situation of powerlessness. You feel how the author drops into emotional free fall until she hits the bottom, and then, like a new person, lifts herself up, greater and stronger spiritually transforming a nightmare into her present day strength and motivation. We perceive two different persons, one before and one after separated by infertility. The book i simple , beautiful and enriching.

Gay Dads: a celebration of fatherhood
Gay Dads: a celebration of fatherhood Image

David Strah

Inspiring portraits of gay men and their families from all across America.

An evolution has quietly been occurring in the world of parenting. Recent surveys reveal that millions of children have found loving homes either by being born to, or adopted by, gay men. This book is a celebration of these remarkable new families.

Gay Dads includes twenty-five personal accounts from men describing their unique journeys to fatherhood and the struggles and successes they have experienced as they raise their children. This is the first book to provide such an expansive exploration of this extraordinary new family unit. With beautiful black-and-white photographs of each of the families, Gay Dads is a moving tribute to familial love.

For Lesbian Parents: your guide to helping your family grow up happy, healthy and proud
For Lesbian Parents: your guide to helping your family grow up happy, healthy and proud Image

Suzanne M Johnson and Elizabeth O’Connors. The Guilford Press, 2001

Key Elements: Focuses on couples, parenting and family issues from a lesbian perspective with valuable food for thought on what to consider when becoming a lesbian parent.

Part One: Has two chapters that look at lesbian mothers, who they are and the do and don’t for lesbian mothers, what you have to be prepared for as a lesbian parent.

Part Two has seven chapters that explore the transition from couple to family, helping children to better understand the family they are in, dealing with others (including professionals and schools) and helping children to deal with them. Part three also includes a section on religion and spirituality which includes how to shop around for a church, helping children to understand religion, and questions if there is a place for lesbians in traditional religion.

Part Three has three chapters that provide information on gender, sexuality, diversity, and homophobia, including information about Barbie Girl and Macho Boy Syndrome and a look at Lesbian Male Basher and ask the question will children of lesbian mothers be gay.

Part Four has three chapters focusing on breaking up, lesbian step families, alternative insemination, and adoption, also includes coming out to your children and what can do to protect your children and yourself in the event of a break up.

Part Five is for future directions and concluding thoughts lesbian_parenting

The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide
The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide Image

Arlene Ister Lev, CSW. Bexkley Books, New York, 2004

Key Elements: contains advice for single parents, same sex couples, bisexual and transgenderd families, adoption, legal issues, emotional issues, and practical parenting issues.
The book contains a breakdown of building the family process from the very beginning starting from ‘alternative families’ through to family life and four different appendixes with value references on the topic. All of the topics are covered thoroughly. It has everything that potential parents need to think about before starting a family and the concerns that many gay and lesbians parents many is facing at the moment.
Part One: Now That You Have Decided To Become A Parent – this section of the book explores alternative families, the pathways that can lead to parenting and the roadblocks to parenting (infertility and pregnancy loss) and the realities of parenting.
Part Two: Building Healthy Families – this section looks at the queer family cycles meaning the evolution and changes to gay and lesbian couples and families. There is a look at the developmental life cycle theories and the bi-cultural elements of such families. It also tells you what you need to know about the legal system, its documentation and preparing agreements that are linked to the alternative parenting process.
Part Three: When the American Dream Becomes A Nightmare – here the focus is on moving away from the beliefs that everything in wonderful once in a relationship and the children come along. How to evaluate your relationship with children and the experience of change that takes place after the parenting has begun. Domestic violence, addiction and mental illness are written about as important elements of some alternative families that are not discussed.
Part Four: Family Life – Dealing with alternative families at home and in the outside world, positive sexuality at home and in relationship[s, spirituality and religion are discussed in detail along with their impact on the individuals and families.

Families Are Talking
Gay Men Choosing to Be Parents
Lesbian and Gay Parenting
A Guide for Gay Dads
Different families The experiences of children with lesbian and gay parents
Gay Men Choosing Parenthood
Gay Men Choosing Parenthood Image

Gerald P. Mallon

Gay parenting is a topic on which almost everyone has an opinion but almost nobody has any facts. Here at last is a book based on a thorough review of the literature, as well as interviews with a pioneering group of men who in the 1980s chose to become fathers outside the boundaries of a heterosexual union–through foster care, adoption, and other kinship relationships. This book reveals how very natural and possible gay parenthood can be. What factors influence this decision? How do the experiences of gay dads compare to those of heterosexual men? How effectively do professional services such as support groups serve gay fathers and prospective gay fathers? What elements of the social climate are helpful–and hurtful? Gay Men Choosing Parenthood challenges a great deal of misinformation, showing how gay fathers from different backgrounds adapted, perceived, and constructed their options and their families.

Gay and Lesbian Parenting
Gay and Lesbian Parenting Image

Eds: Deborah F. Glazer and Jack Drescher

Find sources of support for raising a nontraditional family in a straight world!

The experience of parenting is commonly overlooked in psychological theory, and lesbians and gay men are not typically considered as parents or parents to be. Gay and Lesbian Parenting examines the psychological issues related to developing family and becoming parents for gay men and lesbians. Instead of pathologizing gay and lesbian families, it explores the emotional growth and development issues inherent in child-rearing.

Traditionally, coming out as gay or lesbian meant abandoning any hope of becoming a parent or keeping your children if you already had them. But with the “gayby boom” in full swing, more and more gay and lesbian couples are having new babies, adopting children, and continuing to raise the offspring of previous heterosexual relationships. Although gay and lesbian parents still face unique challenges in building and rearing a family, as well as the usual problems heterosexual couples encounter, Gay and Lesbian Parenting unflinchingly examines these concerns and offers positive suggestions and ideas for dealing with the difficulties.

The Baby Kangaroo Treasure Hunt
The Baby Kangaroo Treasure Hunt Image

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Two kangaroos: Jack and Sam, a gay couple, have their own baby by means of an egg donor and surrogacy. This story enables children to easily understand how they were conceived and it helps gay parents explain in an easy and loving how how their family was formed.

Recipes of How Babies are Made
Recipes of How Babies are Made Image

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Egg donation, sperm donation, embryo donation, surrogacy, adoption and natural birth is explained comparing how a cake is made to how a baby is conceived and it clearly explains all these different forms of conception that exist now-a-days. Just looking at the illustration one can easily understand all this infertility methods. In general, no matter how your child was conceived this book helps them open their minds and informs them of all these artificial reproductive technology methods. This book also helps parents introduce sexuality to their children at a young age.

A Tiny Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life, an Egg Donor Story
A Tiny Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life, an Egg Donor Story Image

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Now-a-days many children are born through egg donation. This touching story of how a happy couple of rabbits have their own baby by means of egg donation. Using rabbits in this story enables children to easily understand their conception in a simple and loving way. It is through storytelling that parents can explain and children understand naturally these infertility treatments.

We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents
We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents Image

Turan Ali. Continuum International Publishing Group Ltd. 1996.

An engrossing look at the reality of being lesbian or gay and a parent, the ways and means of achieving parenthood, and the benefits and challenges of pink parenting in 90s Britain. Based on original interviews with a broad cross-section of lesbian and gay parents, and their children, this account is proof positive that queer parents are making no “pretence” at creating successful new patterns of family relationships. Among the issues examined are: the taboos and myths that traditionally surround same-sex parenthood; artificial insemination; surrogate mothers; adoption and fostering; custody battles; what to tell the children; what to tell your neighbours; what kids think of their queer parents.

Lesbian and Gay Fostering and Adoption: Extraordinary Yet Ordinary
Lesbian and Gay Fostering and Adoption: Extraordinary Yet Ordinary Image

Forward by Pat Verity and Geri McAndrew. Edited by Stephen Hicks and Janet McDermott. Jessica Kingsley Publishers, 1999, 2000

Key Elements: This body of work contains very personal stories from lesbian and gay fosters and those who have adopted, with information regarding the entire process. The reader should be aware that a number of the issues raised in the text have positively progressed since the book was published; however the seventeen personal accountants from individuals and couples that it contains are timeless. The Editorial Essay provides a lot of factual information on the history of gay and lesbian adopting and fostering.

The Queer Parent's Primer: A Lesbian and Gay Families Guide to Navigating the Straight World
The Queer Parent

Stephanie Brill

Synopsis: Straight talk for Gay parents – a practical guide to parenting challenges

Includes examples and interactive exercises to help you through conflicts, define and protect your family, and celebrate and nourish a proud and loving household

Covers the practical realities of laying a foundation for healthy parenting, coming out once and for all, finding culturally sensitive schools, and making decisions about spirituality and family celebrations.

Also includes a section on special concerns of single parents, the complications of breaking up, and the legal concerns of protecting your family.

The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: tips and techniques from conception through birth
The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: tips and techniques from conception through birth Image

Rachel Pepper. Cleis Press, San Francisco, 2005

Key Elements: Covers everything that a woman needs to think about and be aware of as she approaches the decision to have a baby and/or have a healthy and joyful pregnancy.

There are thirteen chapters which cover the process of pregnancy in great detail, including a number of the unspoken topics of pregnancy.
Chapter One: So you Wanna Be a Mama -getting ready for the ride of your life
Chapter Two: Thinking It over and Making a Plan-what you need to work out before you get started
Chapter Three: Getting Started-Now the Fun Really Begins-conception and fertility
Chapter Four: Getting the Goods-sperm, sperm banks, choosing a donor, money and other options
Chapter Five: Surviving the Roller Coaster – Ten Tips to Keep You Sane – taking care of yourself and your body, finding support, taking time out
Chapter Six: Why am I not Pregnant Yet? – Obstacles to the Path to Parenthood -infertility, treatment, fertility drugs, miscarriage and mourning
Chapter Seven: You’re Pregnant-the World of Eating, Sleeping, and Puking-pregnancy the first trimester, the emotional nitty-gritty
Chapter Eight: You’re Well Into It Now – Your Second Trimester – the golden/second trimester, medical test, making birth decisions, Partners, changing life circumstances, into the third trimester
Chapter Nine: Self-Esteem and Sexuality During Pregnancy – sexual desire during pregnancy, sexual self esteem, intimacy, sexual questions
Chapter Ten: Into the Home Stretch/ The Last Trimester-taking care of yourself, problems that arise, medical test, naming the baby, congratulations and celebrations
Chapter Eleven: Birth – the Big Event – when it is really time, the excitement, the three stages of labor, dealing with complications, partners become parents too
Chapter Twelve: Holy Cow-What Now?-lesbian motherhood, and the postbirth revelations.
Chapter Thirteen: Resources

It's a Family Affair: the complete lesbian parenting book
It

Lisa Saffron

The essential guidebook for lesbian mothers and their children in Britain. It includes the experiences of birth mothers, co-parents, step-mothers, single mothers, children, fathers and donors.

Everything you want to know about lesbian parenting – adoption and fostering, step-parenting, homophobia at school, coming out to children, legal recognition of co-parents, fertility awareness, self insemination, anonymous vs known donors; the children’s perspective; the law; when self-insemination isn’t working; donor insemination through clinics.

Pregnantpause A guide for lesbians on how to get pregnant
Partner Abuse/Domestic Violence
Domestic Violence - A resource for gay and bisexual men.
Domestic Violence - A resource for lesbian and bisexual women.
Broken Rainbow - Leaflet
Comparing Domestic Abuse in Same Sex and Heterosexual Relationships
Comparing Domestic Abuse in Same Sex and Heterosexual Relationships Image

Catherine Donovan, Marianne Hester, Jonathan Holmes & Melanie McCarry

(Download PDF)

Violence & Abuse in Same-Sex Relationships:
Violence & Abuse in Same-Sex Relationships: Image

A Review of Literature

(Download PDF)

Partners of Trans
My Gender Workbook
My Gender Workbook Image

Kate Bornstein. Routledge, 1998

Key Elements:
This twelve chapter book contains questionnaires and quizzes to encourage the reader to question their own ideas and the personal perspective on gender. The particulars of the book are very original; among the original ideas is the ‘gender- identity- power pyramid ‘to help place gender in the context of other elements in our society like class, race, and economic status along with the role that these things play in shaping our identity. There is the ‘perfectly gendered questionnaire’ which encourages a 360 degree evaluation of gender. The book also covers related topic like spirituality, and expands on the importance of other related topics.

Chapter One: Welcome To Your Gender Workbook – a reflection on your gender ideas
Chapter Two: Solving The Gender Puzzle- the basics of sex and gender
Chapter Three: Who’s On Top? – a test that reflects how perfectly gendered you may or may not be
Chapter Four: Be All That You Can Be! – living outside the laws of gender
Chapter Five: Fuck Your Gender- love, sex, desire, and gender
Chapter Six: Just Say No-looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Seven: Just Say Yes- looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Eight: Zen and the Art of Gender Maintenance-focuses on all of the identities that you are
Chapter Nine: The Playground-going back to childhood fun
Chapter Ten: Cautionary Interlude-reconnecting with the planet and looking at all of the self, both good and bad
Chapter Eleven: The Quiet Revolution- how to deal with the in revolution
that we are all a part of
Chapter Twelve: Okay, Now What- looking at what’s next on the road to gender discovery

Partners of Trans
A Love Less Ordinary: Sharing Life, Laughter and Handbags with My Transgender Partner
A Love Less Ordinary: Sharing Life, Laughter and Handbags with My Transgender Partner Image

Laura Newman. Bramley Press, 2012

The true story of partnership with someone who is transgender, and realising what a healthy relationship can and should be.If transgender people can find the strength to be open with the world about who they are, considering all the challenges this presents, can’t we all find the courage to be honest with the world about who we really are? The heart and essence of this book is about more than being the partner of someone who is transgender. It’s about learning to be true to yourself. To love yourself and live the life that you want. To be free – truly free – as the person you are meant to be.

 

Personal Growth
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook Image

Written by John Dececco, PhD. and Christopher J. Alexander, PhD. Harrington Park Press. 1997.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook is an educational workbook for gay men that covers a variety of topics, including family of origin, addiction, self-image, dating and relationships, AIDS and multiple loss, and spirituality. Each chapter provides an overview of the mental health concerns of gay men, as well as exercises the reader can do to facilitate his personal understanding of the issues covered. While the book is written in nontechnical language, making it useful to the general public, its wide selection of workbook exercises makes it useful for psychotherapists and counselors working with gay men.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men is written to the reader–with brief examples from the author’s work as a clinical psychologist helping gay men. A central goal of the book is to normalize the feelings and experiences the reader has, as many gay men feel like they’re the only ones with their feelings or experiences. The book’s problem-solving approach addresses:

  • family of origin–provides exercises to identify and examine gay men’s role in the family, examine their childhood perceptions of being different, and help them map out family patterns and dynamics
  • self-image–includes self-image assessment questionnaires and written exercises that challenge the reader to look at how they’re affected by societal perceptions
  • addiction–explores why gay men are vulnerable to addictive behavior and offers strategies for change and self-assessment exercises
  • dating and relationships–covers the unique challenges faced by gay men, with exercises for single as well as coupled men
  • AIDS and mental health–provides exercises to help the reader examine the impact of AIDS on his own life and to assess the impact of multiple loss and prolonged grief

    Readers can do the workbook exercises on their own, or therapists can assign chapters and exercises as homework, with clients bringing the completed assignment to therapy for more in-depth exploration and discussion. By providing informative chapters and useful exercises, Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men becomes an avenue through which gay men can understand their identity, experiences, and goals.

It's Your Hour: A Guide to Queer Psychotherapy
It

By Michael Bettinger

Chapter 1 Psychotherapy and Being Queer

Chapter 2 What is Psychotherapy?

Chapter 3 Psychotherapy: Who is That For?

Chapter 4 Why a Queer Person might want to see a Psychotherapist

Chapter 5 Models of Mental Health

Chapter 6 Treatment Approaches

Chapter 7 The How and Where of Psychotherapy Conversations

Chapter 8 Who are Psychotherapists?

Chapter 9 Locating and Choosing the right Clinician for you

Chapter 10 Settings Where Psychotherapists Work

Chapter 11 Paying for Psychotherapy

Chapter 12 Beginning Therapy

Chapter 13 Aspects of Psychotherapy

Chapter 14 Diagnosis

Chapter 15 Psychopharmacology

Chapter 16 Boundaries

Chapter 17 Alternatives to Psychotherapy

The Adonis Complex: the secret crisis of male body obession
The Adonis Complex: the secret crisis of male body obession Image

By: Harrison G Pope; Katharine A Phillips and Roberto Olivardia

Not specifically a gay book, but it explores what can happen when a desire for a better body gets out of hand. The Adonis Complex is a new form of body dysphoria – akin to anorexia and bulimia.

Reclaiming Your Life. The Gay Men's Guide to Love, Self Acceptance, and Trust
Reclaiming Your Life. The Gay Men

Rik Isensee. Alyson Books, 1991, 1997

Key Elements: Provides the readers with a deep understanding of all of the topics covered, this includes definitions and background information on everything covered in the text. Many of the chapters at the end have ‘Relating These Ideas to Your Own Experience’ which invites the reader to integrate and contrast with their own belief system. There are very good notes and references. Some of the issues mentioned have changed so what it refers to can feel dated, one example is the lack of recognition of gay relationships.

Part One: Homophobia and Trauma
The first part includes six different sections:
Chapter One, Growing Up Gay in a Homophobic Culture which details Homophobia and Heterosexism, How Homophobia Becomes Internalised, Establishing a Gay Identity, Phases in Self -Acceptance.
Chapter Two, Dysfunctional and Abusive Families contains information on the Origins of Positive Self Image, Dysfunctional Families Defined, the Intergenerational Cycle, Types of Abuse, and the Particular Abuse of Gay Boys.
Chapter Three, Effects of Abuse on Gay Sexuality outlines Child Molestation and Homophobia, Age Consent and Youthful Curiosity, a Definition of Sexual Abuse, Reactions to Sexual Abuse, Disclosing the Abuse, and The Effects of Intimate Relationships.
Chapter Four, Posttraumatic Stress explains the Effects of Trauma, AIDs as a Source of Trauma, Internalised Homophobia as a Form of Post-Traumatic Stress.
Chapter Five, Self-Blame and Shame shares information on Guilt and Shame , Abuse and Self-Blame, Homophobia and Shame, Religious Shame , and the Development of a False Self.
Chapter Six, Origins of Self-Destructive Behaviour, breaks down the Cycle of Shame, Alcohol and Substance Abuse Compulsive Behaviour, Sexual Compulsion, Relapse into Unsafe Sex, Overwork and Overachieving ,Food, Debt and Other Compulsions, Self- Deprivation, Co-Dependency in Gay Relationships, Repetition Compulsion and Revictimisation, and Domestic Violence.

Part Two: Reclaiming Your Life
The second part includes six different chapters
Chapter Seven, Understanding the Process of Healing, a walk through the stages of Healing
Chapter Eight, Recovery from Addictions and Compulsions covers the Reluctance to Seek Help, the Strategic Use of Will, Support for Recovery, Gaining Control over Compulsive Behaviour, Explaining the Moment between Impulse and Action, the Higher Power and the Nurturing Self, Spirituality and the Search for Meaning, Relating These Ideas to your Own Experience
Chapter Nine, Working Through Feelings helps the reader with How Feelings Work, Grieving for Your Lost Childhood, Gaining Access to Sadness, Feeling Overwhelmed, Depression, and Mobilizing Anger for Positive Change, Pacing Yourself, Awareness of Feeling Exercise.
Chapter Ten, Self-Nurturing focuses on Distortions in Thinking, How Thoughts Influence Feelings, Feelings versus Conclusions, Suicidal Impulses, Nurturing Your Own Child Self, The Cycle of Healing from Internalised Shame,
Chapter Eleven: All the information needed to increase the support around you points out Self Help, Friends and Lovers, Individual Psychotherapy, and What to Expect in Group Therapy
Chapter Twelve: Self Empowerment , How to empower one’s self through Countering Co-Dependency, Confrontation, The Issue of Forgiveness, Combating Homophobia, Creating Your Own Life.

Reclaiming Your Life. The Gay Men's Guide to Love, Self Acceptance, and Trust
Reclaiming Your Life. The Gay Men

Rik Isensee. Alyson Books, 1991, 1997

Key Elements: Provides the readers with a deep understanding of all of the topics covered, this includes definitions and background information on everything covered in the text. Many of the chapters at the end have ‘Relating These Ideas to Your Own Experience’ which invites the reader to integrate and contrast with their own belief system. There are very good notes and references. Some of the issues mentioned have changed so what it refers to can feel dated, one example is the lack of recognition of gay relationships.

Part One: Homophobia and Trauma
The first part includes six different sections:
Chapter One, Growing Up Gay in a Homophobic Culture which details Homophobia and Heterosexism, How Homophobia Becomes Internalised, Establishing a Gay Identity, Phases in Self -Acceptance.
Chapter Two, Dysfunctional and Abusive Families contains information on the Origins of Positive Self Image, Dysfunctional Families Defined, the Intergenerational Cycle, Types of Abuse, and the Particular Abuse of Gay Boys.
Chapter Three, Effects of Abuse on Gay Sexuality outlines Child Molestation and Homophobia, Age Consent and Youthful Curiosity, a Definition of Sexual Abuse, Reactions to Sexual Abuse, Disclosing the Abuse, and The Effects of Intimate Relationships.
Chapter Four, Posttraumatic Stress explains the Effects of Trauma, AIDs as a Source of Trauma, Internalised Homophobia as a Form of Post-Traumatic Stress.
Chapter Five, Self-Blame and Shame shares information on Guilt and Shame , Abuse and Self-Blame, Homophobia and Shame, Religious Shame , and the Development of a False Self.
Chapter Six, Origins of Self-Destructive Behaviour, breaks down the Cycle of Shame, Alcohol and Substance Abuse Compulsive Behaviour, Sexual Compulsion, Relapse into Unsafe Sex, Overwork and Overachieving ,Food, Debt and Other Compulsions, Self- Deprivation, Co-Dependency in Gay Relationships, Repetition Compulsion and Revictimisation, and Domestic Violence.

Part Two: Reclaiming Your Life
The second part includes six different chapters
Chapter Seven, Understanding the Process of Healing, a walk through the stages of Healing
Chapter Eight, Recovery from Addictions and Compulsions covers the Reluctance to Seek Help, the Strategic Use of Will, Support for Recovery, Gaining Control over Compulsive Behaviour, Explaining the Moment between Impulse and Action, the Higher Power and the Nurturing Self, Spirituality and the Search for Meaning, Relating These Ideas to your Own Experience
Chapter Nine, Working Through Feelings helps the reader with How Feelings Work, Grieving for Your Lost Childhood, Gaining Access to Sadness, Feeling Overwhelmed, Depression, and Mobilizing Anger for Positive Change, Pacing Yourself, Awareness of Feeling Exercise.
Chapter Ten, Self-Nurturing focuses on Distortions in Thinking, How Thoughts Influence Feelings, Feelings versus Conclusions, Suicidal Impulses, Nurturing Your Own Child Self, The Cycle of Healing from Internalised Shame,
Chapter Eleven: All the information needed to increase the support around you points out Self Help, Friends and Lovers, Individual Psychotherapy, and What to Expect in Group Therapy
Chapter Twelve: Self Empowerment , How to empower one’s self through Countering Co-Dependency, Confrontation, The Issue of Forgiveness, Combating Homophobia, Creating Your Own Life.

WELCOMING DIVERSITY IN PRACTICE Psychotherapy and minority sexualities - Moving together into a New Century
Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men
Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men Image

Beverly Greene
Sage Publications. 1997.

A broad range of culture-related topics specific to the lesbian and gay community are explored in this volume. Along with empirical, clinical and theoretical discussions, personal narrative offers poignant insight into additional complexities, pressures and losses that lesbians and gay men must cope with in a world that often handles diversity with bigotry.

Reading Textbooks for Therapists
Pink Therapy
Pink Therapy Image

Edited by Dominic Davies and Charles Neal. Open University Press, 1996

Contents:

An historical overview of homosexuality and therapy – Dominic Davies
Towards a model of gay affirmative therapy – Dominic Davies
Homophobia and heterosexism – Dominic Davies
Working with people coming out – Dominic Davies
Working with single people – Lyndsey Moon
Working with people in relationships – Gail Simon
Lesbian and gay parenting issues – Helena Hargarden and Sara Llewellin
Working with young people – Dominic Davies
Working with older lesbians – Val Young
Working with older gay men – Bernard Ratigan
Alcohol and substance misuse – Graz Kowszun and Maeve Malley
Religious and spiritual conflicts – Bernard Lynch

Reviews:

“A comprehensive British Volume on lesbian and gay affirmative psychotherapy has been a while coming.  Pink Therapy, however, has arrived, amply fills this gap, and is well worth the wait…. I particularly liked the contributors’ subtle appreciation of theoretical nuance, genuine open-mindedness to diversity of ideas, and willingness to synthesise in a pragmatic and client-oriented manner”

John C. Gonsiorek, Past President , Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian and Gay Issues (Division 44 of the American Psychological Association

 

“It is all too easy for the liberal heterosexual therapist to imagine he or she has it all sewn up as far as attitudes to homosexuality are concerned. This book shows that even the politically correct, have so much to learn not just about being gay, lesbian or bisexual, but also about research into sexuality, attitudes amongst therapists, and on training courses as well as in the development of psychotherapy and counselling.”

Michael Jacobs. BACP Fellow and author of numerous psychodynamic textbooks.


Pink Therapy (Vol. 1) has now been translated into Russian!

Relationship Therapy with Same Sex Couples
Relationship Therapy with Same Sex Couples Image

Jerry Bigner and Joseph L Wetchler
Routledge. 2004.

Relationship Therapy with Same-Sex Couples provides psychologists, therapists, social workers, and counselors with an overview of the array of treatment issues they may face when working with couples from the LGBT community. This book highlights the experiences of therapists who have encountered concerns particular to LGBT clients—especially those in intimate relationships. This intriguing resource covers clinical issues, sex therapy, special situations, and training issues for helping therapists successfully counsel same-sex couples.

Relationship Therapy with Same-Sex Couples explores the therapist’s role in working through universal issues in couples therapy—such as communication problems, infidelity, and decision-making—with a focus on how therapy should differ for same-sex couples. This important guide also identifies which problems are unique to couples as an aspect of their sexual orientation, including gender role socialization and societal oppression. With this book, you will be able provide appropriate therapy without over- or under-attributing a couple’s problems to their LGBT status.

This book shows how experienced therapists have developed methods for working with:

  • gay and lesbian parents
  • heterosexual spouses and ex-spouses
  • couples in HIV serodiscordant relationships
  • “lesbian bed death”
  • couple and family dynamics supporting transgender and sexual reassignment issues
  • and more!

Relationship Therapy with Same-Sex Couples contains several features for you to utilize in your own practice, including the Sexual Orientation Matrix for Supervision (SOMS) to assist supervisors and trainers in preparing supervisees to work with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients. The book also offers guidelines for heterosexual therapists who plan to work with same-sex couples and how to overcome any residual homophobia or heterosexual guilt. Lastly, this essential sourcebook reviews several articles, book chapters, books, and Web sites that are relevant to same-sex couples and the therapists who work with them.

Conversations about Psychology and Sexual Orientation
Conversations about Psychology and Sexual Orientation Image

Janis S. Bohan, Glenda M. Russell, et al.
New York University Press. 1999.

Based on the belief that thoughtful dialogue can engender positive change, this work explores the implications for psychology of both essentialist and social-constructionist understandings of sexual orientation. An introduction presenting basic theoretical frameworks is followed by three application sections dealing with clinical practice, research and theory, and public policy. In each, the discussion takes the form of a conversation, as the authors first consider essentialist and constructionist approaches to the topic under review. Scholars chosen for their particular fields of expertise then present their reponses to these thoughts.

My Gender Workbook
My Gender Workbook Image

Kate Bornstein. Routledge, 1998

Key Elements:
This twelve chapter book contains questionnaires and quizzes to encourage the reader to question their own ideas and the personal perspective on gender. The particulars of the book are very original; among the original ideas is the ‘gender- identity- power pyramid ‘to help place gender in the context of other elements in our society like class, race, and economic status along with the role that these things play in shaping our identity. There is the ‘perfectly gendered questionnaire’ which encourages a 360 degree evaluation of gender. The book also covers related topic like spirituality, and expands on the importance of other related topics.

Chapter One: Welcome To Your Gender Workbook – a reflection on your gender ideas
Chapter Two: Solving The Gender Puzzle- the basics of sex and gender
Chapter Three: Who’s On Top? – a test that reflects how perfectly gendered you may or may not be
Chapter Four: Be All That You Can Be! – living outside the laws of gender
Chapter Five: Fuck Your Gender- love, sex, desire, and gender
Chapter Six: Just Say No-looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Seven: Just Say Yes- looking at some of the parts that make up those ideas that police gender and what to reject
Chapter Eight: Zen and the Art of Gender Maintenance-focuses on all of the identities that you are
Chapter Nine: The Playground-going back to childhood fun
Chapter Ten: Cautionary Interlude-reconnecting with the planet and looking at all of the self, both good and bad
Chapter Eleven: The Quiet Revolution- how to deal with the in revolution
that we are all a part of
Chapter Twelve: Okay, Now What- looking at what’s next on the road to gender discovery

 Image

Bill Brent. Cleis Press, 2002

Key Elements: Provides illustrations on the parts of the body and the positions used for anal sex along with tips needed to have good anal sex. The book also has exercises for the reader to learn more anal sex, explore the topic from different points of views and to enjoy anal sex.

Chapter One – Not in My Ass: 12 Myths about Anal Sex for Men
The truth behind the twelve biggest myths about anal sex for men
Chapter Two – How It Works and How to Work It: Anatomy and Exercise
The workings of the anorectal anatomy with diagrams and explanations of the anus, the anal sphincter muscles, the perineal muscles, also has a description and summaries of the functions of the rectum , anal canal, prostate gland, the colon, the large intestines, with techniques and exercises on how to keep them in shape, with information on how to massage the prostate gland. The female G-spot and double penetration
Chapter Three – Self-Exploration and Self Play: Massage, Masturbation, and More
Self-exploration with fingers and tools
Chapter Four – Hygiene and Diet
Basic hygiene and diet, step by step advice and devices used for rinsing
Chapter Five – Communication
How to open verbal communication can increase the likelihood of satisfying anal sex (also includes discussing safer sex and degree of risk issues)
Chapter Six – Latex and Lube
Latex and polyurethane, condoms, and lubricants
Chapter Seven – Tools and Toys
Toys, and what makes a good anal sex toy (includes varieties of butt plugs, dildos, oral beads, and vibrators)
Chapter Eight – Tongue in Cheek: Analingus
The tongue and anal sex plus health risks to consider
Chapter Nine – Penetration
Suggestions for the insertive partner and suggestions for the receptive partner with illustrations on positions for anal sex
Chapter Ten – Fisting
Myths about fisting, information for the insertive partner, and the receptive partner
Chapter Eleven – Extreme Sex: S/M, Gender Play, Festishes, Piss Play, and Scat Play
S/M and anal play – how to negotiate, gender play, electrical play, piss play, and the health risk associated with them
Chapter Twelve – Recreational Drugs and Sex
Recreational drugs – alcohol, cocaine, ecstasy, marijuana, poppers, methamphetamine
Chapter Thirteen – Anal Health
Anal irritations, hemorrhoids, anal fissures, anal fistulas, STD, Chlamydia, epididymitis, prostatitis, gonorrhea, hepatitis, hepatitis A, hepatitis B, hepatitis C, herpes, HIV, venereal warts, anal sex, pregnancy, and your anal health and well being
Chapter Fourteen – Resources
A list of books, magazines,videos, etc.

Counseling Same Sex Couples
Counseling Same Sex Couples Image

Douglas Carl
W.W. Norton & Co. 1991.

This practical book on counselling focuses on the reality of homosexual relationships in a hostile world and on the essential issues for same-sex couples. Among the topics covered are systematic interventions, special problems, parenting, AIDS and substance abuse.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Queer Psychology: An Introduction
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Queer Psychology: An Introduction Image

Victoria Clarke, Sonja J. Ellis, Elizabeth Peel and Damien W. Riggs
Cambridge University Press. 2010.

This exciting and engaging textbook introduces students to the psychology of lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans and queer lives and experiences. It covers a broad range of topics including diversity, prejudice, health, relationships, parenting and lifespan experiences from youth to old age. The book includes ‘key researcher’ boxes, which outline the contributions of significant individuals and their motivations for conducting their research in their own words. Key issues and debates are discussed throughout the book, and questions for discussion and classroom exercises help students reflect critically and apply their learning. There are extensive links to further resources and information, as well as ‘gaps and absences’ sections, indicating major limitations of research in a particular area. This is the essential textbook for anyone studying LGBTQ psychology, psychology of sexuality or related courses. It is also a useful supplement to courses on gender and developmental psychology.

Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Identities over the Lifespan: Psychological Perspectives
Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Identities over the Lifespan: Psychological Perspectives Image

Anthony R. D’Augelli and Charlotte J. Patterson
OUP USA. 1996.

Over the last fifteen years, psychological research regarding sexual orientation has seen explosive growth. In this book, Anthony R. D’Augelli and Charlotte J. Patterson bring together top experts to offer a comprehensive overview of what we have discovered – and what we still need to learn – about lesbian, gay, and bisexual identities. Writing in clear, nontechnical language, the contributors cover a range of topics, including conceptions of sexual identity, development over the lifespan, family and other personal relationships, parenting, and bigotry and discrimination. Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Identities Over the Lifespan is essential reading for researchers, students, social scientists, mental health practitioners, and general readers who seek the most up-to-date and authoritative treatment of the subject available.

Sexuality: A Biopsychosocial Approach
Sexuality: A Biopsychosocial Approach Image

Dr. Chess Denman
Palgrave Macmillan. 2003.

Of interest to psychotherapists and counsellors of all kinds, this text describes key issues and controversies in human sexuality as they present in therapy practice. The author uses the biopsychosocial approach to human behaviour to analyze sexual behaviour, object choice, transgendered experience, sexual problems, transgressive sex and sex therapy. Issues of sexuality in the consulting room, including transference and countertransference, are discussed and, throughout, therapeutic approaches to sexual problems are presented. The human capacity for inventive imagining is presented as an important force for beneficial change and, in relation to sexuality, discussed in terms of the ‘erotic imagination’.

Psychoanalytic Therapy and The Gay Man
Psychoanalytic Therapy and The Gay Man Image

Jack Drescher
Routledge. 2001.

Do the conventional insights of depth psychology have anything to offer the gay patient? Can contemporary psychoanalytic theory be used to make sense of gay identities in ways that are helpful rather than hurtful, respectful rather than retraumatizing? In Psychoanalytic Therapy and the Gay Man Jack Drescher addresses these very questions as he outlines a therapeutic approach to issues of sexual identity that is informed by traditional therapeutic goals (such as psychological integration and more authentic living) while still respecting, even honoring, variations in sexual orientation.

Drescher’s exploration of the subjectivities of gay men in psychoanalytic psychotherapy is more than a long-overdue corrective to the inadequate and often pathologizing tomes of traditional psychoanalytic writers. It is a vitally human testament to the richly varied inner experiences of gay men. Drescher does not assume that sexual orientation is the entire or even major focus of intensive psychotherapy. But he does argue, passionately and convincingly, that issues of sexual identity – which encompass a spectrum of possibilities for any gay man – must be addressed in an atmosphere of honest encounter that allows not only for exploration of conflict and dissociation but also for restitutive confirmation of the patient’s right to be himself.

Through its abundance of first-person testimony from both clinical and literary sources, Psychoanalytic Therapy and the Gay Man provides the reader with an unforgettable grasp of what it is like to discover that one is gay in our society and then to find the courage and humanity to live with that knowledge. Any mental health professional – regardless of his or her sexual orientation – who wishes to deal therapeutically with gay men will find Drescher’s work indispensable. But it will also be compelling reading for anyone seeking psychological insight into gay men’s lives and concerns.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture Image

Jack Drescher, MD and Kenneth Zucker, PhD
Routledge. 2006.

Defenders and critics of the controversial Spitzer study analyze its methodologies and findings

In 2001, Robert L. Spitzer, MD, presented his study on sexual conversion therapy with its controversial findings that some homosexuals can change their sexual orientation. The resulting media sensation and political firestorm enraged the study’s critics and emboldened its supporters. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture presents leading experts examining Spitzer’s research methodology and findings to discern whether the study itself deserves deeper consideration or outright dismissal. Every facet of the study is reviewed to discuss the positive or negative aspects of the results, its significance in political and social terms, and the implications for the future.

Dr. Spitzer himself was an instrumental figure in the American Psychiatric Association’s decision in 1973 to remove homosexuality as a mental illness listing from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual-III. His later study that states that in some individuals, homosexuality may be more fluid than previously thought stirred controversy in the psychiatric community and society at large. His study is presented here to allow the reader to evaluate and consider it for themselves. Leading experts then voice their own pro or con views on the methodology and findings. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture fearlessly illustrates the sometimes fuzzy boundary between science and politics, courageously spotlighting the culture wars now dividing our society.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture discusses:

  • the ex-gay movement
  • the nature of scientific inquiry
  • the relationship between science and politics
  • the results of sexual conversion therapies
  • gay and lesbian rights

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture is essential reading for sex researchers, mental health professionals, pastoral counsellors, political activists, and any person asking if one can truly “change” his or her homosexuality.

The Gay and Lesbian Psychotherapy Treatment Planner
The Gay and Lesbian Psychotherapy Treatment Planner Image

J. M. Evosevich and Michael Avriette
John Wiley & Sons. 2000.

Features pre–written treatment plan components (behavioral definitions, long–term goals, short–term objectives, therapeutic interventions, and DSM–IV diagnoses) for special problems faced by gay and lesbian clients. This planner includes coverage of issues such as helping gay and lesbian clients cope with adoption, abusive partners, coming–out, hate crimes, internalized homophobia, rape, religious shame, AIDS/HIV, suicidal ideation, etc. Psychologists, counselors, therapists, and other professionals who work with gay and lesbian clients will find this planner invaluable.

Transgender Warriors (Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman)
Transgender Warriors (Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman) Image

Leslie Fienberg. Beacon Press, 1996

Key Elements: This body of work takes a historical, multicultural, and personal, approach to the issues of gender and those that have fought to change society’s perception of gender. The book also includes an International Gender Bill of Rights, a list of transgender organisations and publications. There are pictures throughout the book that document the transgender journey historically and culturally.

Part One: The author’s personal history and other early transgender histories

Chapter One – The Journey Begins
Chapter Two – My Path to Consciousness
Chapter Three – The Give Away
Chapter Four – They Called Her ‘Hommasse’

Part Two: Transgendered multicultural identities around the world

Chapter Five – Our Second Past
Chapter Six –  Bigotry Began
Chapter Seven –  They Had Slaves!
Chapter Eight – Natural Becomes ‘Unnatural’

Part Three: Transgender warriors throughout history and transgender pioneers

Chapter Nine – ‘Holy War’ against Trans People
Chapter Ten – Leading the Change
Chapter Eleven- Not Just Passing

Part Four: The spiritual elements of the intersexed identity

Chapter Twelve – From Germany to Stonewall
Chapter Thirteen – To Be or Not to Be
Chapter Fourteen – Sisterhood: Make It Real!
Chapter Fifteen – Making History

Part Five: The Portrait Gallery

Lesbians and Psychoanalysis: Revolutions in Theory and Practice
Lesbians and Psychoanalysis: Revolutions in Theory and Practice Image

Edited by Judith M. Glassgold
Simon and Schuster. 1995.

Psychoanalytic theories of lesbian development epitomize the difficulty in liberating psychoanalysis from the past. Psychoanalytic theory has traditionally adopted a clear position that a lesbian orientation represented some form of psychological abnormality. Thankfully– but only very recently– some influential feminist leaders have begun to rethink issues of gender and sexual orientation, removing heterosexuality from its privileged position as normal. In “Lesbians and Psychoanalysis”, Judith M. Glassgold and Suzanne Iasenza bring together twenty-six of these pioneers in the field of lesbian psychoanalytic theory. Through insightful chapters based on years of clinical experience, each author helps to redefine psychoanalytic theory by reinventing its foundations from an affirmative perspective so that it better represents all peoples.

“Lesbians and Psychoanalysis” addresses several topics of emerging concern including multicultural diversity, self-disclosure, homophobia, transference/countertransference issues, bisexuality, and the changing nature of lesbian sexuality. In addition, the authors examine the influence of stigma on human development. In three sections– Past, Present, and Future– the authors in turn critique past theory, discuss current issues in therapy, and describe new directions in theory and practice. This is a book that is sure to appeal not only to members of the psychoanalytic community but also to all those who are interested in gay and lesbian studies, feminism, and psychology.

Another Mother Tongue: Gay Words, Gay Worlds
Another Mother Tongue: Gay Words, Gay Worlds Image

Judy Grahn
Beacon Press. 1991.

 

It is a luminous tapestry uniting strands of cultural history, folklore, the queer collective unconscious and autobiography, woven with superlative skill in which is recounted everything of importance about us as a people: who we are, where we’ve come from, and why we are special. The author develops her thesis that, as queers, we are heir to a special office of great antiquity and critical import. We queers are the standers on the Threshold and keepers of the Gate. It is to those like ourselves that civilizations and societies locked in the throes of radical transformation turn, as though to a physician to assure a painless and quiet death for the old and as though to midwives to attend the safe birth of that which is new.

The product of over a decade of research, the author has done nothing less than retrieve our entire suppressed history, our folklore, our pantheons of deities and demons, our spiritual heritage and its lineages and our glorious language – another mother tongue.

Couple Therapy with Gay Men
Couple Therapy with Gay Men Image

David E. Greenan and Gil Tunnell
Guilford Press. 2002.

This book illuminates the unique needs of gay male couples in therapy and provides a practical framework for clinical intervention. The authors review the basic principles of structural family therapy and guide therapists in adapting treatment goals and interventions to better serve gay clients. Addressed are the universal issues faced by all couples in therapy, gay and straight, as well as the particular challenges gay men face in building nurturing, intimate relationships in a homophobic society. Extensive case examples and session transcripts are used to illustrate effective strategies for helping clients affirm the strength of their union, even in the absence of familial and social support; learn to resolve differences constructively; and overcome culturally conditioned barriers to connection and trust.

We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents
We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents Image

Turan Ali. Continuum International Publishing Group Ltd. 1996.

An engrossing look at the reality of being lesbian or gay and a parent, the ways and means of achieving parenthood, and the benefits and challenges of pink parenting in 90s Britain. Based on original interviews with a broad cross-section of lesbian and gay parents, and their children, this account is proof positive that queer parents are making no “pretence” at creating successful new patterns of family relationships. Among the issues examined are: the taboos and myths that traditionally surround same-sex parenthood; artificial insemination; surrogate mothers; adoption and fostering; custody battles; what to tell the children; what to tell your neighbours; what kids think of their queer parents.

Understanding Non-Monogamies
Understanding Non-Monogamies Image

Meg Barker and Darren Langdridge Ed.
Routledge 2009

Most social scientific work on intimate relationships has assumed a monogamous structure, or has considered anything other than monogamy only in the context of ‘infidelity’. Yet, in recent years there has been a growing interest among researchers and the public in exploring various patterns of intimacy that involve open non-monogamy. This volume gathers contributions from academics, activists, and practitioners throughout the world to explore non-monogamous relationships. Featuring both empirical and theoretical pieces, contributors examine the history and cultural basis of various forms of non-monogamy, experiences of non-monogamous living, psychological under- standings of relationship patterns, language and emotion, the discursive construction of mono-normativity as well as issues of race, class, disability, sexuality and gender. This volume will be of interest to academics and practitio- ners working in the social sciences and anyone who is seeking greater insight into the intricacies of non-monogamous relationships.

Pink Therapy Vol 2: Therapeutic Perspectives on a Working with Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Clients
Pink Therapy Vol 2: Therapeutic Perspectives on a Working with Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Clients Image

Edited by Dominic Davies and Charles Neal. Open University Press, 2000

Contents:

Analytical psychology – Deirdre Haslam
Cognitive-behavioural therapy – James Gray
Existential-phenomenlogical therapy – Martin Milton
Gay, lesbian and bisexual therapy and its supervision – James Pett
Neuro-linguistic psychotherapy – Denis Bridoux and Martin Weaver
Person-centred therapy – Dominic Davies
Psychoanalytic psychotherapy – Susannah Izzard
Psychosynthesis – Keith Silvester
Social constructionist and systemic therapy – Gail Simon and Gwyn Whitfield
Transactional Analysis – Graham Perlman

Reviews:

“An invaluable resource for all therapists and counsellors. (And I do mean all.) The book’s challenging and innovative strategy of linking theoretical orientation and sexual orientation sets it apart from other, apparently similar volumes. The various contributions are notable for the exemplary way they link psychological concepts and the human experience of therapist and client in the work.”

Andrew Samuels, Professor of Analytical Psychology, University of Essex

“Written from a well-informed insider’s perspective on each theory, this book demonstrates a real coming of age of therapeutic work with lesbian, gay and bisexual clients. Many books in the past have been written about the difficulties of therapeutic work with these clients. This book, by contrast, puts theoretical perspectives on the couch, explores their strengths and weaknesses in relation to this client group and offers affirming strategies and solutions to working within these models.”

Sue Webb, President of the New Zealand Association of Counsellors

Pink Therapy Vol. 3: Issues in Therapy with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual and Transgender Clients
Pink Therapy Vol. 3: Issues in Therapy with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual and Transgender Clients Image

Edited by Charles Neal and Dominic Davies. Open University Press, 2000

Contents:

Issues of race, culture and sexuality – Rita Brauner
Kink therapy: SM and sexual minorities – Denis Bridoux
Management of ethical dilemmas – Lynne Gabriel and Dominic Davies
Issues in HIV/AIDS counselling – Pavlo Kanellakis
Expressive therapy – freeing the creative self – Timothy McMichael
Psychosexual therapy – Ian McNally and Naomi Adams
We are family: gay men in groups – Charles Neal
Looking both ways: bisexuality and therapy – Claire Lucius and Elizabeth Oxley
Working with people who have been sexually abused in childhood – Fiona Purdie
Long term consequences of bullying – Ian Rivers
Gay men and sex: clinical issues – Jan Schippers
Transgender issues – Tony Zandvliet

Reviews:

“A diverse and extremely useful set of chapters at the cutting edge of thinking on work with sexual minorities…. An important and too often neglected aspect of therapists’ and counsellors’ training which this book does much to correct.”

Susie Orbach, author of The Impossibility of Sex

Lesbian and Gay Psychology Edited by Adrian Coyle and Celia Kitzinger Pub: Blackwell 2002 £23
Lesbian and Gay Psychology  Edited by Adrian Coyle and Celia Kitzinger Pub: Blackwell 2002 £23 Image

This British-edited and authored collection on lesbian and gay psychology. Leading names in the field discuss a broad range of concerns cutting across social,  health, developmental, educational and counselling psychology. These include topics such as development during adolescence, girls’ friendships, identity formation and disclosure, parenting and family issues, health issues, psychotherapy and social attitudes.

Psychoanalytic Therapy & The Gay Man
Psychoanalytic Therapy & The Gay Man Image

Jack Drescher

Through its abundance of first-person testimony from both clinical and literary sources, Psychoanalytic Therapy and the Gay Man provides the reader with an unforgettable grasp of what it is like to discover that one is gay in our society and then to find the courage and humanity to live with that knowledge.  Any mental health professional – regardless of his or her sexual orientation – who wishes to deal therapeutically with gay men will find Drescher’s work indispensable.  But it will also be compelling reading for anyone seeking psychological insight into gay men’s lives and concerns.
Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians: Contemporary Dynamic Approaches
Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians: Contemporary Dynamic Approaches Image

Eds: Jack Drescher, Anne D’Ercole and Erica Shoenberg
Routledge. 2003.

Examine gay and lesbian psychoanalysis from a variety of perspectives!

Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians: Contemporary Dynamic Approaches presents case histories of psychotherapy sessions with gay and lesbian patients, focusing on today’s psychoanalytical approaches. Dedicated to enhancing the emotional, psychological, and psychiatric treatment of gay men, lesbians, and bisexuals, the book features prominent analysts with a wide range of clinical and theoretical approaches. The foremost experts in the therapeutic field address issues affecting gay and lesbian patients from psychoanalytic perspectives that respect the patients’ sexual identities.

Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians reflects the significant clinical and theoretical changes therapists face in dealing with issues of gender and sexuality. New ways of thinking coexist with traditional theory as paradigm shifts in psychotherapy and psychoanalysis affect the treatment of gay, lesbian, and bisexual patients. This book provides a forum to address those changes through clinical papers and discussions.

Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians includes discussion of case reports that deal with:

  • gay therapists treating gay patients
  • countertransferential enactments of sex and gender in treatment
  • rethinking the meanings of homosexuality
  • psychotherapeutic treatment of gay male patients with AIDS
  • and much more!

Psychotherapy with Gay Men and Lesbians is an essential forum for the exchange of clinical information on gay and lesbian psychotherapy. The book is a valuable resource for psychiatrists, psychologists, social work therapists, psychoanalysts, and anyone interested in today’s psychoanalytic approaches to homosexuality.

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapies with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Clients
Cognitive-Behavioral Therapies with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Clients Image

This book provides a framework for affirmative, empirically supported cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients. Guidelines for competent assessment and treatment are integrated with practical descriptions of widely used CBT applications. In addition to presenting powerful treatment tools for depression, anxiety, and other problems encountered by gay and straight clients alike, the book offers clear-cut guidance on helping individuals and couples cope with the stresses of sexual minority status. Rich case illustrations bring to life the diversity of lesbian and gay communities, highlighting commonalities as well as differences among the issues that clients bring to therapy. Appendices include resources and sample client and therapist forms.

Feeling Queer or Queer Feelings? Radical Approaches to Counselling Sex, Sexualities and Genders
Feeling Queer or Queer Feelings? Radical Approaches to Counselling Sex, Sexualities and Genders Image

Ed: Lyndsey Moon Pub: Routledge 2008 £23

 

Highly innovative and contemporary ideas for counsellors, counselling and clinical psychologists and psychotherapists to consider in their work with non-heterosexual clients.

Ground-breaking ideas are presented by new thinkers in the area for issues such as:

  • coming out
  • transgender desire
  • theoretical modalities in working with HIV
  • the role of therapy in bondage and discipline, domination and submission, and sadomasochism
  • the use of queer theory in therapeutic research.

Feeling Queer or Queer Feelings? will challenge present ideas about sex, gender and sexuality, and will prove to be invaluable for clinicians in this field

Safe, Sane and Consensual: Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism
Safe, Sane and Consensual: Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism Image

Eds: Darren Langdridge & Meg Barker

Pubs: Palgrave 2008 £53 hardback


This book is available via a special Pink Therapy discount of 50%, meaning you pay £26.50 + p&p
Please download this form and post or fax to Vince Leach at Palgrave (fax: 01256 330688)

Sex, Sexuality and Therapeutic Practice: A manual for therapists and trainers.
Sex, Sexuality and Therapeutic Practice: A manual for therapists and trainers. Image

Eds: C. Butler, A. O’Donovan and E. Shaw. Routledge 2010 £22.99 RRP

This new book, (co-edited by Pink Therapy Associate Catherine Butler), is a valuable addition to the library of any therapist or trainer working in the field of human sexuality. As one can see from the chapters titles it’s comprehensive in it’s focus:

Sex, body, behaviour and identity
Talking about sex
Health, disability and sex
Sexual and gender minorities: consideration for therapy and training
Sexual and sexuality across the lifespan
Culture, sex and sexuality.

There are plenty of practical exercises for group work or indeed self-reflexive practice. The book takes a non-heteronormative stance and is written in a accessible style.

Understanding Non-Monogamies
Understanding Non-Monogamies Image

Meg Barker and Darren Langdridge Ed.
Routledge 2009

Most social scientific work on intimate relationships has assumed a monoga- mous structure, or has considered anything other than monogamy only in the context of ‘infidelity’. Yet, in recent years there has been a growing interest among researchers and the public in exploring various patterns of intimacy that involve open non-monogamy. This volume gathers contributions from academics, activists, and practitioners throughout the world to explore non- monogamous relationships. Featuring both empirical and theoretical pieces, contributors examine the history and cultural basis of various forms of non- monogamy, experiences of non-monogamous living, psychological under- standings of relationship patterns, language and emotion, the discursive con- struction of mono-normativity as well as issues of race, class, disability, sexu- ality and gender. This volume will be of interest to academics and practitio- ners working in the social sciences and anyone who is seeking greater insight into the intricacies of non-monogamous relationships.

Counselling Ideologies
Counselling Ideologies Image

Lyndsey Moon
Ashgate 2010

“Counselling Ideologies” draws our attention to the dilemmas inherent within the therapeutic ideologies commonly subscribed to by psychotherapists and counsellors working with those who challenge heteronormative models and approaches. Identifying the modernist, heteronormative understandings of the world implicit in the more popular models, this book employs queer theory to challenge these ideologies, drawing on disciplines both within and outside of counselling and psychology, as well as sociology, cultural studies and various ethnographic accounts. It highlights the dilemmas faced by those who may wish to practise as ‘queer therapists’, addressing not only therapeutic dilemmas, but also issues such as: identity, race, coming-out experiences, ‘internalised homophobia’, ‘empathy’, ‘ethical issues’, bisexuality and pathologisation. Comprising contributions from both academic experts and practitioners from the UK, USA and Australia, this book represents a new approach to counselling and psychotherapy that will appeal not only to sociologists and those working in the field of mental health, but also to scholars of race and ethnicity, gender, queer studies and queer theory.

 

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook Image

Written by John Dececco, PhD. and Christopher J. Alexander, PhD. Harrington Park Press. 1997.

Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men: A Workbook is an educational workbook for gay men that covers a variety of topics, including family of origin, addiction, self-image, dating and relationships, AIDS and multiple loss, and spirituality. Each chapter provides an overview of the mental health concerns of gay men, as well as exercises the reader can do to facilitate his personal understanding of the issues covered. While the book is written in nontechnical language, making it useful to the general public, its wide selection of workbook exercises makes it useful for psychotherapists and counselors working with gay men.
Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men is written to the reader–with brief examples from the author’s work as a clinical psychologist helping gay men. A central goal of the book is to normalize the feelings and experiences the reader has, as many gay men feel like they’re the only ones with their feelings or experiences. The book’s problem-solving approach addresses:
family of origin–provides exercises to identify and examine gay men’s role in the family, examine their childhood perceptions of being different, and help them map out family patterns and dynamics
self-image–includes self-image assessment questionnaires and written exercises that challenge the reader to look at how they’re affected by societal perceptions
addiction–explores why gay men are vulnerable to addictive behavior and offers strategies for change and self-assessment exercises
dating and relationships–covers the unique challenges faced by gay men, with exercises for single as well as coupled men
AIDS and mental health–provides exercises to help the reader examine the impact of AIDS on his own life and to assess the impact of multiple loss and prolonged grief

Readers can do the workbook exercises on their own, or therapists can assign chapters and exercises as homework, with clients bringing the completed assignment to therapy for more in-depth exploration and discussion. By providing informative chapters and useful exercises, Growth and Intimacy for Gay Men becomes an avenue through which gay men can understand their identity, experiences, and goals.

Transsexual and Other Disorders of Gender Identity: A Practical Guide to Management
Transsexual and Other Disorders of Gender Identity: A Practical Guide to Management Image

Edited by James Barrett. Radcliffe Publishing. 2007.

People with gender identity problems are increasingly often encountered by health professionals. The problems are often imagined to consist only of transsexuality, but actually comprise of both this and many other diagnoses. Properly establishing a diagnosis and excluding alternatives including psychosis, partial androgen insensitivity syndromes and personality disorder is complex. The subsequent management of these disorders and their differential diagnoses is even more so. “Transsexual and other Disorders of Gender Identity” provides a comprehensive and extremely practical account of the management of disorders of gender identity and their differential diagnoses. Particular consideration is given to, among others, coincidental mental illness, disability, family and relationship issues, forensic and military settings. Psychological and endocrine aspects are covered in depth, surgical aspects to a level adequate for all but a specialist surgeon, and legal aspects to the level generally needed by health professionals. This book provides vital detail for general practitioners, surgeons, endocrinologists, speech therapists, social workers and, especially, psychiatrists.

“I conceived and edited this book because when asked for recommended reading on the practicalities of treatment for disorders of gender identity I had nothing to suggest to others. I was always able to provide lists of books which dealt with the classification of gender identity disorders, and texts rich with competing aetiological theories. There were also fascinating sociopolitical (including post-modern) expositions. The problem always came with recommending practical texts for everyday clinical use.” – James Barrett, in the Preface.

Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions
Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions Image

Written by R. Dennis Shelby and Nancy L. Beckerman. Routledge. 2005.

Previous books on this subject—mostly written in the days when HIV/AIDS was considered a fatal rather than a chronic disease—focused on end-of-life issues. However, Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions addresses the unique emotional challenges facing today’s couples of mixed HIV status and provides a conceptual framework for assessment and intervention. The book offers examples of how to apply emotionally focused couple therapy to help them work through issues including disclosure, the fear of HIV transmission, shifts in emotional intimacy, family planning, betrayal, mistrust, and uncertainty. This unique work, its knowledge base, and the interventions you’ll find inside, are applicable to any practitioner who provides couple and family therapy—as well as any practitioner who counsels around issues of chronic illness.

Couples of Mixed HIV Status provides therapists with a range of theoretical approaches to help mixed HIV status couples deal with their issues and concerns. It includes applications of couple therapy approaches that have proved to be particularly effective as well as case studies that demonstrate how different relationship variables may affect therapy. The book presents the findings of a research study involving 44 mixed HIV status couples in the Northeast and is generously illustrated with tables that make complex research results easy to access and understand.

Topics covered in Couples of Mixed HIV Status include:

  • various approaches to couples therapy
  • the historical context of HIV/AIDS
  • HIV transmission
  • family planning and HIV/AIDS
  • emotionally focused couple therapy
  • disclosure issues
  • attachment theory
  • and much more!

Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions is a valuable resource for therapists and other mental health counselors working with today’s couples of mixed HIV status as well as for students of counseling and health related services. Readers who may be in a mixed HIV status relationship or those who are friends and family members of couples living with HIV will also find this book helpful.

Ties that Bind - The SM/Leather/Fetish Erotic Style. Issues, Commentaries, and Advice
Ties that Bind - The SM/Leather/Fetish Erotic Style. Issues, Commentaries, and Advice Image

Guy Baldwin, MS. Daedalus Publishing, 1993

Key Elements: The book is written for those men who have already undertaken leather/SM lifestyle and would like to additional insight into the leather/SM lifestyle.

The book is a collection of essays that the author previously published in magazines and journals (Drummer, Checkmate, The Leather Journal, Manifest Reader). It is divided into four parts that focus on different aspects of the leather/SM identity.

Part One: The Relationship Essays

Relationships with others, and self are discussed, how to maintain a romantic leather/SM relationship, group relationships, slave and master relationships, the role of the scene in a healthy relationship, and problem solving solutions are all covered.

Part Two: The Community Commentaries Essays
The importance of family, communities and interacting segments as part of a complete social network, also covered is being part of a group, the essays mention attire and norms for the leather/SM community, family, politics in the leather community, along with leather beauties and leather beast are covered.

Part Three: On Enhancing the SM Experience

Sexual communication, communicating about safer sex, sexual play, the exchanges between tops and bottoms, top behaviour, bottom behaviour, consent, communication and negotiation, recreational drug use, humiliation, punishment and guidelines for emotional safety when connecting with the SM scene and are covered.

Part Four: Catapulting towards Transformation
Pushing limits for bottoms, how bottoms out number tops and the reasons why and the spiritual element of SM are covered.

Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men
Ethnic and Cultural Diversity among Lesbians and Gay Men Image

Beverly Greene
Sage Publications. 1997.

A broad range of culture-related topics specific to the lesbian and gay community are explored in this volume. Along with empirical, clinical and theoretical discussions, personal narrative offers poignant insight into additional complexities, pressures and losses that lesbians and gay men must cope with in a world that often handles diversity with bigotry.

Regional GSD
E.A.G.L.E - (Equality for All Gays and Lesbians Everywhere)
E.A.G.L.E - (Equality for All Gays and Lesbians Everywhere) Image

E.A.G.L.E is running an informal free social group and is offering an opportunity for the LGBT community to come together in a safe and welcoming environment.

http://www.feedbackonline.org.uk/eagle/

Relationships & Dating
Understanding Non-Monogamies
Understanding Non-Monogamies Image

Meg Barker and Darren Langdridge Ed.
Routledge 2009

Most social scientific work on intimate relationships has assumed a monogamous structure, or has considered anything other than monogamy only in the context of ‘infidelity’. Yet, in recent years there has been a growing interest among researchers and the public in exploring various patterns of intimacy that involve open non-monogamy. This volume gathers contributions from academics, activists, and practitioners throughout the world to explore non-monogamous relationships. Featuring both empirical and theoretical pieces, contributors examine the history and cultural basis of various forms of non-monogamy, experiences of non-monogamous living, psychological under- standings of relationship patterns, language and emotion, the discursive construction of mono-normativity as well as issues of race, class, disability, sexuality and gender. This volume will be of interest to academics and practitio- ners working in the social sciences and anyone who is seeking greater insight into the intricacies of non-monogamous relationships.

Husband Hunting Made Easy And Other Miracles for the Modern Gay Man
Husband Hunting Made Easy And Other Miracles for the Modern Gay Man Image

Patrick Price. 1998

Key Elements: Takes a hard, mildly pessimistic but lightly entertaining look at finding the right man.

The author when putting together this body of work seems to treat relationships between gay men as a rarity. The differences between a boyfriend and a husband are defined as are the reasons for leaving a husband. The book is humorous throughout. There a lot of tips about different things for example,’ things not to do when husband hunting’, ‘steering clear of open relationships’ and ‘finding your own boyfriend, and not someone else’s’. The often overly comical approach which includes ‘don’t date men who wax’ or ‘never date anyone with the same first name’ could stop someone from starting a loving relationship with a man who has the same first name or one who does not like being overly hairy. What to watch out for in chat rooms and personal ads in mentioned. The book looks at why it is important to imagine your ideal man (and then settle for 85% of him). When the book takes the topics seriously it does a very good job. In one part the book says ‘we psychologically protect ourselves from rejection by rejecting all our suitors’. Which is a topic that may resonate with some readers. There is also a section in the text that asks the reader to take a self-inventory. Pointing out how to do it ad why it is important. There are list of extras and additional information that could make you laugh and help you to reflect at the same time including; a quiz on ‘How Needy You May Be’, a list of Top Ten Most Pathetic Opening Lines, Sex: when and why:( never have sex on the first encounter), ‘The First Date: What To DO’, ‘Dating Do’s and Don’ts’,’ Do’s and Don’ts of Being a Couple’, ‘Counterproductive Dating Personas’, ‘Why Not to Move In Just to Split the Rent’,’ Reasons Why Not To Dump Him When the First Real Problems Arise’, and finally ‘How Not To Confuse Being Comfortable With Being Boring’.

Lesbian Couples
Lesbian Couples Image

D. Merille Clunis and G. Dorsey Green. Seal Press, 1988

Key Elements:
Taken from the experiences of lesbians it covers all of the topics important to building, starting and sustaining a loving lesbian relationship. The topics discussed in the book make good reading for anyone gay, lesbian, or heterosexual who is entering into or hoping to build a stronger relationship even though it was written twenty years ago.

They book is broken down into the following eighteen parts:
1. What is a Couple Anyway? – Defining relationships within the context of lesbian love and modern culture.
2. Stages of Relationships – Labelling and defining the stages of relationships; 1. pre-relationship stage (assumptions that are made about one another), 2. romance stage (merging and fusion together), 3. conflict stage (what we think we are going to get, what we actually get, and negotiating the difference,4.acceptance stage( the calm before the storm).5.commitment stage(making choices and being responsible for them, letting go of the fantasy and accepting the reality of relationships,6.colloboration(focusing together on the bigger picture).
3. Separateness and Togetherness – creating intimacy, personal boundaries, trust, openness, and caring.
4. Living Arrangements – the advantages and disadvantages of living apart, long distance relationships, living apart in different countries, living with others, living alone with a partner.
5. Work, Money and Time – pooling resources, value differences, contracts in the relationship and time are covered.
6. Sex – butch/femme, sadomasochism, current controversies about lesbian relationships, frequency, enhancement, initiation and desire.
7. Monogamy or Nonmonogamy – The advantages and the disadvantages
8. Friends, Family, and Sense of Community – friendship networks and jealousy, family and sense of community,
9. Lesbain Couples with Children – coming out, being out and how children react to it, types of families and society at large.
10. How Racism Affects Couples – discrimination in society and dealing with it.
11. Differences – class, age, politics, values, spirituality, sexual orientation
12. Understanding Each Other – blocks to communication, different perspectives and the skills involved in gaining a better understanding of one another.
13. Resolving Conflict – asking for what you want, fighting styles, and a useful model for resolving conflict: step 1. Warm-up, personal preparation done individually, step 2. Set the time (the length of discussion about the conflict), step 3.State the problem (clear description with the facts), step 4. State the feeling (using I statements), 5. Specific request for change, step 6. Respond and negotiate (summarizing and agreeing to conditions) step 7.Reach resolution (agreement to deal with the conflict or agreeing to meet to discuss the conflict again), step 8. Clarify the agreement.
14. Recovery – focuses on incest, child abuse, adult children of alcoholics, and chemical dependencies
15. Disablity – covers stereotypes, the impact of disability on relationships, chronic illness, self esteem and internalised oppression, includes suggestions for ablebodeid and disabled partners.
16. Growing Older Together – highlights the needs of older couples and the issues that are related to growing old together are detailed.
17. Endings – gives advice about breaking up and the reasons that most lesbian relationships end along with dealing loss are
18. Beginning Again – how to understanding the past and how to love again.

Lesbians Talk Violent Relationships
Lesbians Talk Violent Relationships Image

Joelle Taylor and Tracey Chandler. Scarlet Press, 1995

Key Elements: The discussion of abuse in the lesbian community is covered very well in this little book. The discussions are not dated; they are very relevant to the modern discussion of domestic violence in the lesbian community. The impact of feminism on the lesbian community and the role that it played is the shaping of the lesbian identity is touched upon in some detail.

The book contains four different parts:

Naming the Abuse – This section defines abuse, physical abuse, the different types of sexual abuse, the self abuse of the abuser.
Psychological Consequence – This section looks at the support that can be given, common reactions to abuse, co-mothers and the custody of children, and the consequences of living with any types of abuse.
Survival Stories – Accountants from those who have made it through abusive relationships.
Myths and Stereotypes – Sado-masochism, Butch-Femme, Race and Racism, Alcohol and Drug Dependency and their impact on lesbian relationships and the power dynamic of relationships are covered from different perspective.

Other topics that the book tackles are internalised homophobia, the cycle of abuse theory, power and control, the response of the community and the future for the lesbian community.

The Male Couples's Guide - Find a Man, Making a Home, Building a Life
The Male Couples

By Eric Marcus. Harper Perennial, 1988, 1992

Key Elements: Covers everything from meeting a man to aging gracefully together as a couple

The author starts with where and how to meet a men, finding a partner and courtship. He focuses a great deal of attention on existing as a couple by highlighting the importance of agreements in relationships and defining boundaries as a couple like monogamy and nonmonagamy. Written before the internet revolution (but not dated) the author clearly, carefully, and openly describes ways of introducing a partner to family, legal options, financial options and how they are important to sustaining a happy long term relationship. All of the topics covered include couple/individual interviews and are broken down into subsections of interest that look more closely at other areas of which religion, health ,couple problems and difficulties, aging/physical changes and planning for the later years are all explained.

Together Forever? The Gay Guide to Good Relationships
Together Forever? The Gay Guide to Good Relationships Image

Andrew Marshall. Pan Books, 1995

Key Elements:
Factual information and reflective questions help the reader to get a picture of what they want out of a relationship

Although this book contains information regarding HIV and AIDS that is dated, the author sets out the stages of gay relationships in a factual way drawing on numerous interviews with gay men who have been together and using the interviews to outline what changes gay men go through in relationships. Starting with ‘Finding the Right Partner’ which is part of stage one,’ the Blending Stage’ and how in this stage gay men focus exclusively on the new partner. Stage Two is called the ‘Nesting’, is setting up and sharing a living space together. Stage Three is called ‘Self Affirming’, is the importance of setting up and maintaining boundaries. Stage Four is ‘Collaborating’, it is about working together to stay together, being faithful or unfaithful and deciding on an open or closed relationship. Stage Five is ‘Adapting’ to the changes in the relationship and the changes to individuals in it. Stage Six is ‘Repartnering’ which focuses on growing old together. The book closes with the difference between gay and straight relationships. The book makes interesting reading for people who already find themselves in relationships.

The MANdates. 25 Real Rules for Successful Gay Dating
The MANdates. 25 Real Rules for Successful Gay Dating Image

Dave Singleton, 2004

Key Elements: Overly camp but offers some food for thought about gay dating yet does not seem to encourage being your self nor open and honest communication.

A light hearted accountant of gay dating, using personal experiences of gay dating. There are nine parts of the book that cover topics that are related to the author’s rules of gay dating.
The first chapter looks at the rules, how they came about and how to best apply them.
Chapter two gives the three reasons why you need to get his details.
Chapter three is about why friends should keep quiet about what they see and think about you and your dating.
Chapter four focuses on pacing the courtship and not rushing.
Chapter five looks at the fast and furious romance and giving yourself and someone else time.
Chapter six tells you what CD’s say about the type of man someone is.
Chapter seven outlines what a medicine chest says about a man.
Chapter eight provides information about social incest in the gay community and not saying tool little, or too much.
Chapter nine defines what ‘single’ really should mean and other key terms to define when dating.
Chapter ten is everything you need to know you can know in the first five minutes reading between the lines of what he says.
Chapter eleven is about how to know where the dates are going.
Chapter twelve helps you to know the difference between Mr. Right and Mr. Right Now.
Chapter thirteen outlines what to say and not what to say six months in.
Chapter fourteen provides information about sharing, sharing clothes.
Chapter fifteen introduces the topic of meeting friends.
Chapter sixteen lays out the advantages and disadvantages to dating the different types of men that are out there.
Chapter seventeen explains monogamy in relationships.
Chapter eighteen determines the difference between what will be a short term relationship and what will be a long term relationship.
Chapter nineteen talks about when and how you should talk about past partners.
Chapter twenty gives details about on line surfers and internet gay dating.
Chapter twenty one tells when giving space is too much space.
Chapter twenty three points out why you need to build your own relationship not copy others relationship models.
Chapter twenty four tells you what you should forgive and not forgive in the relationship.
Chapter twenty five offers information on how to integrate your two lives.
There is additional information on the do’s and don’ts of dating , pick up lines, tips for on line dating, the milestones of gay dating, gay role models and other information.

Internet Dating
Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions
Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions Image

Written by R. Dennis Shelby and Nancy L. Beckerman. Routledge. 2005.

Previous books on this subject—mostly written in the days when HIV/AIDS was considered a fatal rather than a chronic disease—focused on end-of-life issues. However, Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions addresses the unique emotional challenges facing today’s couples of mixed HIV status and provides a conceptual framework for assessment and intervention. The book offers examples of how to apply emotionally focused couple therapy to help them work through issues including disclosure, the fear of HIV transmission, shifts in emotional intimacy, family planning, betrayal, mistrust, and uncertainty. This unique work, its knowledge base, and the interventions you’ll find inside, are applicable to any practitioner who provides couple and family therapy—as well as any practitioner who counsels around issues of chronic illness.

Couples of Mixed HIV Status provides therapists with a range of theoretical approaches to help mixed HIV status couples deal with their issues and concerns. It includes applications of couple therapy approaches that have proved to be particularly effective as well as case studies that demonstrate how different relationship variables may affect therapy. The book presents the findings of a research study involving 44 mixed HIV status couples in the Northeast and is generously illustrated with tables that make complex research results easy to access and understand.

Topics covered in Couples of Mixed HIV Status include:

  • various approaches to couples therapy
  • the historical context of HIV/AIDS
  • HIV transmission
  • family planning and HIV/AIDS
  • emotionally focused couple therapy
  • disclosure issues
  • attachment theory
  • and much more!

Couples of Mixed HIV Status: Clinical Issues and Interventions is a valuable resource for therapists and other mental health counselors working with today’s couples of mixed HIV status as well as for students of counseling and health related services. Readers who may be in a mixed HIV status relationship or those who are friends and family members of couples living with HIV will also find this book helpful.

Gay and single... forever? 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know.
Gay and single... forever? 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know. Image

Steven Bereznai, 2006

Key Elements: Points out the positives of being single, the negatives of being in a relationship and everything in between

The book takes a very personal approach to everything that it covers. Not taking itself too seriously, it starts with the feelings that someone might have about being gay and single. From the historical evolution of the gay movement and its influence on gay dating and relationships it goes to where the push to be partnered has come from. Gay Exs, tricky lovers, and what to do about them is handle with humour as well as everything else. The book is like a long essay. Even though humorous it does tackle the future of gay acceptance, the difficulties of finding the right guy and how boyfriends do not bring happiness. There are interesting elements that provoke thought like ‘finding the boyfriend within’ and how to love being single, not just single looking for a relationship. The author does explain the natural chemical in our bodies that are involved in bonding and falling in love (oxytocin) and how wanting to be in love is natural (although it is argued that staying in love in not natural.)The affects of HIV and AIDS on gay relationships in covered as is the difference between a healthy relationship and a co-dependent relationship, along with other types of relationships. Everything in the book is related back to personal experiences of the author is underpinned by a humorous approach.

Moving On - The Gay Man's Guide For Coping When A Relationship Ends
Moving On - The Gay Man

Dann Hazel. Kensington Books, 1999.

Key Elements
: Questionnaires that help to reflect on the difficult topic of breaking up

This witty book explores the dissolution of love and when it’s time to make a move. The author approaches it in an open and humorous way. All of the points are covered in an everyday friendly way that can be understood and appreciated. Warning signs and, growing apart are looked at using information gathered during interviews with a number of individuals. The author encourages the reader, through questionnaires, to look at romantic satisfaction, determining your intimacy level, determining your bitterness, relationship assessment, and loneliness and insecurity. Built in around the questionnaires is very useful information on the importance of values, the lack of common goals, how to handle a break up, healing after a relationship, the qualities of close friendships, the importance of family and being single again.

PACE Self-Esteem Workbook for Gay Men
PACE Workbook on Getting what you want in relationships
Affirmative Gay Relationships: Key steps in finding a life partner
Affirmative Gay Relationships: Key steps in finding a life partner Image

Neil Kaminsky, 2003.

Key Elements:
Covers all of the theoretical how to’s involved in finding and partner, starting a happy relationship and keeping it going
Written using his personal perspective, real life antidotes and realistic personal situations the author lays out the key steps to involved in encountering a real life partner. A real life partner is defined as, ‘someone who materially enhances your life’. The quotes and information in the book come from gay men who have completed a questionnaire, mental health professionals and the author.

Chapter one covers how what someone does or does or does not do attracts a partner and what gets in the way of finding love (issues like trust , fear of rejection and the over importance placed on youth and beauty , and importance of being able trust).
Chapter two covers what it takes to keep a relationship going, the need to release attachment to the ‘single life’, dealing with the anxiety of intimacy and emotional maturity.
Chapter three focuses on the acceptance of self and others and how being obsessed with youth and physical appearance are a hurdle that must be overcome in under order to meet the right person.
Chapter four explores the beliefs that cause the anxiety of the feelings of desperation and the appearance of which can prevent someone form being able to meet others.
Chapter five helps the reader to evaluate his own availability and the availability of others to make serious commitment. Examples are given of men who are unavailable like those who have not yet grieved the end of a previous relationship, those who are too involved in other pursuits and men who are chronically angry.
Chapter six looks at the positive life affirming aspects of love are explored. This chapter also looks at how to realistically prepare your life and yourself to be involved in a relationship. Joint decision making is also covered.
Chapter seven outlines the core values to develop a clear picture of what type of relationship you are looking for, the readers given an exercise to specifically identify the type of life partner you seek.
Chapter eight points out how an individual’s behaviour can be a self fulfilling prophecy, illustrating how negative expectations can lead to a negative result in finding and sustaining a relationship, why an individual may have developed and been holding on to a ‘negative belief’ system and what can be done to address and change a negative pattern.
Chapter nine is about where and how to meet people and the importance of feeling comfortable while doing so, it also mentions the variety of places and environments where its possible to meet people and the advantages and disadvantages of meeting in those places. The individual’s personal power and role in meeting people is highlighted.
Chapter ten provides strategies of how to cope with fear and rejection, and how to conquer rejection and freely move towards the person that you desire.
Chapter eleven points out to the reader the counter productiveness of unrealistic expectations of a relationship and how to deal with the ugly side of a partner and mistakes that are made in the relationship.
Chapter twelve deals with the importance of risking being intimate and being accepting and embracing one’s own emotional vulnerability.
Chapter thirteen examines managing dating and the anxiety it can cause, summarising the lessons learned in previous chapters. Questions are set up to determine if the man that you are seeing and if he has all that it takes to be a real life partner.

Boyfriend 101. A Gay Guy's Guide to Dating Romance and Finding True Love
Boyfriend 101. A Gay Guy

Jim Sullivan, 2003.

Key Elements: Helps the reader to prepare a detailed list of ideas of what they are looking for and what they need to consider for successful gay dating

Containing experience of men that the reader may identify with, the author uses professional experience from his work as a teacher, counsellor, school principal, community activist, and a relationship coach and dating coach, he conducted relationship workshops. He explores dating in detail, puts questions forward to the reader about dating and other topics covered to help people consider where they are in the dating/relationship process. Other parts of the book detail the inner teenager who may enjoy the playfulness, seductiveness of dating, the myths of dating, and the different types of dates and a dating self assessment. There are lists of internal qualities, wants versus needs (what yours are and how to evaluate them, and being honest about what you want. There are six levels of conversation that are detailed and the art of flirting is covered. The do’s and don’t of dating and when to have sex (in order to build a good relationship) are also given by the author.

Finding True Love in a Man-Eat-Man World: the intelligent guide to gay dating, romance and eternal love
Finding True Love in a Man-Eat-Man World: the intelligent guide to gay dating, romance and eternal love Image

Craig Nelson, 1996.

Key Elements: Exploration of deeply rooted gay related issues to love and relationships

The book starts off by asking the reader if it the right time to be dating. It points out the good elements to being single. It helps the reader by focusing early on in the book on the difference between ‘what you want and what you need’. The author explores the topic of gay self hatred, where it comes from, and the background to what he calls gay unacceptance and gay acceptance. Some of the information in the book reflects that it was written in 1996. There is however timeless information about how we avoid love, what bad self esteem can do, and the different types of personalities that can get in the way of love are pointed out. The author draws attention to modern love, and the history of love. The importance of forming new ideas about love and life are mentioned and the influence that our existing ideas about love have on how we build lasting relationships is made clear to the reader. The sex tips like setting the mood, how to have oral sex, and how to have anal sex could be useful to someone who is need of basic information. There are some dating tips. There is also a list of the types of men that normally cause trouble, the list is a bit too long to be very useful but it is amusing. The list includes the terminally single, the whiplash lover (the man who always looks over his shoulder for someone better), and the middle aged kid (who lives like he is in an eternal high school student).

Permanent Partners: building gay and lesbian relationships that last
Permanent Partners: building gay and lesbian relationships that last Image

Betty Berzon (2004) Revised Edition

This revised edition of a best selling book from one of the foremost relationship therapists working with lesbians and gay men.

Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally-Committed Relationships
Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally-Committed Relationships Image

David Schnarch (1998)

An excellent self-help book for couples in committed relationships.

When It's Time to Leave Your Lover - A Guide for Gay Men
When It

Neil Raminsky. Harrington Park Press, 1999.

Key Elements: Considering breaking up or if you have already started this book is worth the read

This book breaks down the difficult subject matters connected to a painful topic that most gay men have had to face. It touches on important elements like jealousy, dysfunctional needs, chemical dependency, violence and others briefly and then picks them up later again at other points in the book. Also the book covers ‘reinventing yourself’ and ‘healthy ways of saying goodbye’ using examples throughout. Looking at matters of intimacy and emotions in various categories the author is able to offer supportive advice on all of the matters related to knowing when it is time to end a relationship and how to do it. He even covers topics often neglected like: what happens to the friendships that partners build up with each other friends, and dating each others friends once the relationship is over. Covered in very clear way the author has also seriously looked at’ why you shouldn’t go back’ and ‘taking a relationship vacation’. He optimistically finishes up with ‘starting over: loving a man’.

Couple Therapy with Gay Men
Couple Therapy with Gay Men Image

David E. Greenan and Gil Tunnell
Guilford Press. 2002.

This book illuminates the unique needs of gay male couples in therapy and provides a practical framework for clinical intervention. The authors review the basic principles of structural family therapy and guide therapists in adapting treatment goals and interventions to better serve gay clients. Addressed are the universal issues faced by all couples in therapy, gay and straight, as well as the particular challenges gay men face in building nurturing, intimate relationships in a homophobic society. Extensive case examples and session transcripts are used to illustrate effective strategies for helping clients affirm the strength of their union, even in the absence of familial and social support; learn to resolve differences constructively; and overcome culturally conditioned barriers to connection and trust.

Religion Conflict Support
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture Image

Jack Drescher, MD and Kenneth Zucker, PhD
Routledge. 2006.

Defenders and critics of the controversial Spitzer study analyze its methodologies and findings

In 2001, Robert L. Spitzer, MD, presented his study on sexual conversion therapy with its controversial findings that some homosexuals can change their sexual orientation. The resulting media sensation and political firestorm enraged the study’s critics and emboldened its supporters. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture presents leading experts examining Spitzer’s research methodology and findings to discern whether the study itself deserves deeper consideration or outright dismissal. Every facet of the study is reviewed to discuss the positive or negative aspects of the results, its significance in political and social terms, and the implications for the future.

Dr. Spitzer himself was an instrumental figure in the American Psychiatric Association’s decision in 1973 to remove homosexuality as a mental illness listing from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual-III. His later study that states that in some individuals, homosexuality may be more fluid than previously thought stirred controversy in the psychiatric community and society at large. His study is presented here to allow the reader to evaluate and consider it for themselves. Leading experts then voice their own pro or con views on the methodology and findings. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture fearlessly illustrates the sometimes fuzzy boundary between science and politics, courageously spotlighting the culture wars now dividing our society.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture discusses:

  • the ex-gay movement
  • the nature of scientific inquiry
  • the relationship between science and politics
  • the results of sexual conversion therapies
  • gay and lesbian rights

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture is essential reading for sex researchers, mental health professionals, pastoral counselors, political activists, and any person asking if one can truly “change” his or her homosexuality.

 Image

Courage is a UK-based, not for profit, evangelical Christian ministry, founded in 1988

http://www.courage.org.uk/

Lesbian & Gay Christian Movement

http://www.lgcm.org.uk/

Truth Wins Out. Fighting the Anti-Gay Lies and the Ex-Gay Mith

http://www.truthwinsout.org/

Ex-Gay Watch. News and analysis of exgay politics and culture

http://www.exgaywatch.com/wp/

Religion Culture Spirituality
Christianity, Social Tolerance and Homosexuality: Gay People in Westen Europe from the Beginning of the Christian Era to the 14th Century
Christianity, Social Tolerance and Homosexuality: Gay People in Westen Europe from the Beginning of the Christian Era to the 14th Century Image

J. Boswell
University of Chicago Press. 1981.

John Boswell’s National Book Award-winning study of the history of attitudes toward homosexuality in the early Christian West was a groundbreaking work that challenged preconceptions about the Church’s past relationship to its gay members – among them priests, bishops, and even saints – when it was first published twenty-five years ago. The historical breadth of Boswell’s research (from the Greeks to Aquinas) and the variety of sources consulted make this one of the most extensive treatments of any single aspect of Western social history. “Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality”, still fiercely relevant today, helped form the disciplines of gay and gender studies, and it continues to illuminate the origins and operations of intolerance as a social force.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture
Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Relation to Science, Religion, Politics and Culture Image

Jack Drescher, MD and Kenneth Zucker, PhD
Routledge. 2006.

Defenders and critics of the controversial Spitzer study analyze its methodologies and findings

In 2001, Robert L. Spitzer, MD, presented his study on sexual conversion therapy with its controversial findings that some homosexuals can change their sexual orientation. The resulting media sensation and political firestorm enraged the study’s critics and emboldened its supporters. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture presents leading experts examining Spitzer’s research methodology and findings to discern whether the study itself deserves deeper consideration or outright dismissal. Every facet of the study is reviewed to discuss the positive or negative aspects of the results, its significance in political and social terms, and the implications for the future.

Dr. Spitzer himself was an instrumental figure in the American Psychiatric Association’s decision in 1973 to remove homosexuality as a mental illness listing from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual-III. His later study that states that in some individuals, homosexuality may be more fluid than previously thought stirred controversy in the psychiatric community and society at large. His study is presented here to allow the reader to evaluate and consider it for themselves. Leading experts then voice their own pro or con views on the methodology and findings. Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture fearlessly illustrates the sometimes fuzzy boundary between science and politics, courageously spotlighting the culture wars now dividing our society.

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture discusses:

  • the ex-gay movement
  • the nature of scientific inquiry
  • the relationship between science and politics
  • the results of sexual conversion therapies
  • gay and lesbian rights

Ex-Gay Research: Analyzing the Spitzer Study and Its Relation to Science, Religion, Politics, and Culture is essential reading for sex researchers, mental health professionals, pastoral counselors, political activists, and any person asking if one can truly “change” his or her homosexuality.

FAITHBOOK A GUIDE TO FAITH AND SPIRITUALITY FOR LESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL AND TRANS PEOPLE
RELIGION AND SEXUAL ORIENTATION How to manage relations in the workplace